kabab of pumpkins
Collin is sick. Brandon survived meetings.
Tis the season
Wind is shifting
kabab of pumpkins
Horrendous cacophony arrose
Record the sauce time
Eaters of the Dead: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Eaters_of_the_Dead
Haiku:
Seconds ticking by
But mouths continue to move
Students forced to wait
Links
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A VERY ROUGH TRANSCRIPT OF THE EPISODE
PROVIDED BY OTTER.AI
Collin 0:05
Welcome to Oh Brother, a podcast where we try to figure it all out with your hosts Brandon and Collin on this week's show, kebab of pumpkins. Ahoy,
Brandon 0:19
ahoy!
Collin 0:20
How are you?
Brandon 0:22
I am exhausted. How are you?
Collin 0:24
I am. I am very sick. Oh no!
Brandon 0:29
Get a wee bit cold, and everybody's getting sick. Congress Grace.
Collin 0:33
Mine started like two days ago. My body was just like, you know what? It's happening, and I was like, no.
Brandon 0:39
Where's the zinc? Get the zinc. Let's go. I'm struggling.
Collin 0:43
I'm battling, and it just all like came to a culmination today where I woke up and I was just like, like everything is so non-functional and all. Oh my god, sad face. Yeah, it is. And tonight, I don't know what's the what's the real feel low for you tonight. Since this is what we do, we start off that we gotta start by talking about the weather because weather is like a major topic here. Like, I
Brandon 1:09
mean, this is a podcast based out of the Midwest, so like, really, what else could the leading topic be, right? What is the
Collin 1:17
unfortunate part, guys?
Brandon 1:19
Yeah, my phone was being weird. So I I don't really know exactly, but I feel like ours is weird. When I was looking at it earlier, like the high temperature is occurring in like the middle of the night at some point for tomorrow.
Speaker 1 1:35
Yeah. So yeah, we
Collin 1:39
have the wonderful thing of the low. Okay, so if you just look at the air temperature, okay, it's supposed to be like 50. If you look at the feels like the low is 32.
Brandon 1:57
Yeah, so that is the other thing that is weird because like I can't remember if my phone went open. Here we go. So like at some point, yeah, ours. I don't know if our feels like drops that far yet, but yeah, our wind is shifting pretty here, like right about now, and so like tomorrow's high happens at like, uh, yeah, about 1o'clock in the morning. A glorious time. Yeah. So like the the air temperature at midnight is going to be like 55.
Speaker 1 2:40
Sure.
Brandon 2:40
But then like by eight a.m. the air temperature will be about 45. But yeah, there's 18 mile an hour northwest wind, which means our feels like temperature will be in the 30s. Love it, pretty cool.
Collin 2:58
Love it.
Brandon 2:58
Yeah, so so that's pretty exciting.
Collin 3:03
Yes, is the like obscenely cold temperature. So yes, we are you're sick, but we did a fall event today. Regardless of it, we went to. So they don't do a lot of public things. They don't do public pumpkin carving because there's a lot that can go wrong whenever you flood of
Brandon 3:26
stabbing. Yeah, that's potentially problematic. Yes.
Collin 3:29
Also, it takes forever, and it and it changes the age range of children that can also attend when you're like. Because I, for the longest time, it was like, oh, I'm going to carve the kids' pumpkins, and I still do. But oh my gosh, it's like when you really are like, no, I want the they want this design. Like all of a sudden, you're in this for like that's a couple hours project. No, I feel
Brandon 3:50
like public pumpkin carving. That's kind of hard to say. It's like pliter alliteration is a little tough, but I feel like that should be like a speed event, right? Like a like a contest. Carve the best pumpkin in 20 minutes. Go like without. You could start with icing off your butt. Start with them gutted already. Okay.
Collin 4:14
Oh, see that's the thing. Yeah. I feel like you could
Brandon 4:17
if you start with him opened, and they're like design 2025 minutes go, boom, and then community judges by putting their token in the top of the jackalator. Blam! You can just put it in there like that.
Collin 4:35
Yes,
Brandon 4:38
I think we're onto something here. Sounds brilliant to me. I don't know. I don't know what can go wrong. Everything's fine.
Collin 4:45
It's probably okay. We can get him
Brandon 4:47
some like leather gloves to reduce cutting based injuries, right?
Collin 4:52
Or steel gloves. You know what are they? The guys that wear those gloves in like the fish markets. You know. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah.
Brandon 5:00
Like the chainmail,
Collin 5:01
yes, yes. This is what is needed. I think
Speaker 1 5:04
chainmail pumpkin gloves.
Collin 5:06
Absolutely, definitely.
Brandon 5:08
Like the shark divers wear, right?
Collin 5:10
This. Why is this not more of a thing? This is. I have long thought that it would be great to have some shark diver gloves. I would. I mean,
Brandon 5:20
you could probably procure some. I can't imagine that would be a. I don't know. Could that be a pet sitter business expense?
Collin 5:30
Probably if I
Speaker 1 5:33
email gloves,
Collin 5:34
I would write it off of for having
Speaker 1 5:39
safety gear.
Collin 5:40
No, it would be. Oh gosh, no! For like administering medications,
Speaker 1 5:46
is
Collin 5:47
would be would be my ploy of this. There you go, effectively.
Brandon 5:52
Ooh, okay. So for the cat claws can just slip the gaps right in there. Just still doesn't matter. Just right through the chain. Bam. Like a rondel dagger. Oh, wow! Look at that reference. There we go, ladies, gentlemen. It was a nerdy comment. It's fine. Don't worry about it.
Collin 6:17
It's okay. We'll just we're just gonna keep moving. Was moving
Brandon 6:20
on. Yes. Anyway. Anyway. Susan was very pleased with herself because we were at okay. We had one of those experiences that we went to Walmart and we bought literally the most random assortment of things of all time. Oh, yeah. So, but they had the pumpkin selection currently for the like carving pumpkins that we're not going to carve, but she just wants to sit outside with her flowers and stuff. We're particularly excellent at this time, and she got like a massive pumpkin.
Collin 6:54
Oh no,
Brandon 6:56
she was sort of frolicking with a big pumpkin as best you possibly can, right? Okay. She was very pleased with this. She was very excited. It was like actually cold and cloudy, and she had a pumpkin, and she was just like, "Yes, is the best thing of all time. Yeah, I finally fall. There it is. No,
Collin 7:17
this is the day I have been waiting for for like three weeks of, I just want it to get at least to drop 20 degrees. It needs to rain and be cloudy, and then I can like fully embrace fall. More importantly,
Brandon 7:30
not be 90 degrees. That's the real. That's the real winning formula. There.
Collin 7:36
Key here is that it's not 90. I
Brandon 7:40
might have to wear a sweater tomorrow? Holy! I know. Like
Collin 7:44
I know it's going to be quite the event. Quite exciting. I know. I know. So now we must have
Brandon 7:50
like reading time tomorrow. So bring my book. Do you think murder mystery is the appropriate stop, drop, and read time thing? I think that's fine. I think it's fine, right? It's totally okay. It's okay. Okay.
Collin 8:05
Oh, so no. So we did not carve pumpkins in public. Instead, what we did was we painted pumpkins. This is this is more common these days when you go to like a a public event, you paint pumpkins. This is
Brandon 8:22
what you've been doing a lot of this anyway for the past several years. I have seen painted pumpkins.
Collin 8:30
Yeah,
Brandon 8:31
right. I guess more artistic expression available.
Collin 8:35
It also goes faster, and again expands the age range. So we have, and it
Brandon 8:40
goes faster. It goes way
Collin 8:43
faster. Except, except here's the thing: depending on how you paint, suddenly it's like, oh, I'm painting with acrylic paint indoors, and it's like goopy. So this is not going to dry for like a day. And if you try and do layers, all of a sudden, it's a very, very thing. Yeah,
Brandon 9:04
because the surface of the pumpkin is kind of wet and porous a bit. Porous. So, like,
Collin 9:09
and then you've got to. If you paint, you're like, oh, I want to do like black, and then I'm going to paint something on top of that of that paint. Well, you can't. You got to wait.
Brandon 9:17
So you can't do that. So what you're telling me is we should spray paint the pumpkins first.
Speaker 1 9:22
Should absolutely, absolutely do that. Perfect. Okay. Yes. Because we spray
Collin 9:29
paint base coat. Well, so what we did at first, we were just going to go, and it was going to be for the kids, and they started to do their stuff, and then Megan was like, "Oh, I think we should do a pumpkin. So I was like, "Okay, I, I did not come prepared for pumpkin paint. I have no ideas. I have no thoughts on this. So you know what? Good luck to us. So we're like, we're gonna paint our pumpkin together. Cool, cool. Well, then we like sat and stared at each other. We're like, what do you want to paint? I don't know. What do you want to paint? I don't know. What do you want to paint? So here's what we decided. Draw a
Brandon 10:00
line down the middle and each paint a half.
Collin 10:02
No, no, it had to be a joint project. Okay, that's what I said.
Brandon 10:05
You could each paint half of the pumpkin. No, no, no, no. It
Collin 10:08
had to be a. It would like go together.
Collin 10:09
No, well. Oh, you okay?
Brandon 10:11
Join in. So as far as like simultaneous same thing. One cohesive piece. Yes, yes. Okay,
Collin 10:18
okay. So no, our here was our vision, all white pumpkin. So nice white pumpkin. Okay, okay, like a
Brandon 10:25
chunking pumpkin, chunking pumpkin, right? Yeah, all nice
Collin 10:27
white. And then we're gonna do a we're gonna do a nice big red heart on it, and we're gonna do C plus M, right? It's gonna be all cutesy dorbs,
Brandon 10:37
all very Halloweeny, very Halloweeny.
Collin 10:40
All the white goes on, and then we're like, "Well, it's not dry yet. So, but like, we only have so much time before this event is done, and we gotta, kind of, kind of, gotta go, and blah blah. Well, we'll just go ahead and paint the red heart. Okay. Well, as we start to paint the red heart, it's mixing with the white paint, and it's becoming more and more pink.
Brandon 11:04
Yeah,
Collin 11:05
and so then we had to add more red to it to make it red, and then all of a sudden it's we have now goopy. And what happens if you have a vertical surface and goopy paint? Oh, it runs like crazy. So now, so the paint drips is is an all white pumpkin melting with a blood red heart that is dripping and bleeding all across the front.
Brandon 11:35
And we're back to Halloween again. Look at that, right? It's Halloween.
Collin 11:37
I was like, it's like it's just a really intense love. Ah, it's crazy. And Lillian, Lillian started to do the same thing. She wanted to do a like a skeleton, so it was going to be all white pumpkin with black eyes and a mouth. And she was at first she started to do just she's like, oh, I'll do red in the middle of the eyes. Well, then, then her red started to run a little bit, and once one ran, then she was like, "It's all red. So it's her pumpkin, like like this skeleton ghoul, where it's like coming out of the eyes, the mouth, the nose. Like this is a really intense pumpkin thing we have going on here. That is
Brandon 12:25
quite. That is yeah. That's kind of crazy.
Collin 12:28
Little little creepy. Oh my gosh! And Noah's Noah. We came in. He was like, I don't know what I want to paint. And then all of a sudden, he looks and up on the up on the TV, they are showing one of the one of those like screensavers for whatever, like a what is it? I don't know some some streaming device, little stick that goes into the back. It's a screensaver, and it's it's Snoopy, and he's
Brandon 13:01
oh yeah, he's
Collin 13:02
like, I'm going to do Snoopy.
Brandon 13:05
That is the most correct answer, I think. Okay,
Collin 13:08
so he's he's got Snoopy, he's got the bird, he's got the doghouse, he's got he built made a tree. Like it's a whole on scene over there with Snoopy, and I was like, nice, very well done. We have a bleeding heart. We have a ghoul, and we have Snoopy, and we will be we. And then I'm painting, and I'm realizing this is going to be wet for hours.
Brandon 13:34
Yeah, yeah, that is the problem with acrylic paint. Yeah, I can't take this in my transport this.
Collin 13:40
I can't even pick my pumpkin up, like because I painted the whole thing white, and so I'm like sheepishly like trying to get the organizer's attention. She comes over and I'm like, "Hi, I'd like to leave this here if that was okay and pick it up tomorrow. And she was like, "Yeah, that's totally fine. Put it over the corner. Here's here's a card with your name. Great, because I'm not transporting any of these. Okay,
Brandon 14:10
I had a vision, Collin. All right, I need you to cast your mind back. Who knows how many episodes at this point to the hand rake conversation, and I, I just envisioned you donning the hand rakes and like scooping the pumpkin. Oh, you know what? Had I planned? Had I planned, I totally would have had hand rakes, or just like stabbing the pumpkin in the side, and be like, "Yeah, now we're carrying
Collin 14:43
spearing them all on a make a skewer, make pumpkins, yes, and walking out
Brandon 14:51
like a big kebab, like
Collin 14:54
kebab of pumpkins. Yes, yes, yes, and and still, and I just."
Brandon 15:00
I just all of a sudden remembered the hand rake thing. It was like, oh my god, it would be perfect. I know,
Collin 15:04
I know. This is tis. It's tis the season for the hand rakes. True. We're ready for these.
Brandon 15:12
It's actually fallish outside. Actually, as previously stated.
Collin 15:15
Oh my gosh, I know. I'm I'm ready for this. But yeah, that was our that was our weapon. I just remember like putting starting again. I'm a I'm a slow thinker right now, especially being sick. It was just like, wait a minute, how am I going to transport three sopping wet pumpkins home in the car? Oh, that's right, I'm not. So we need to figure out another option here. But folks, dang, dang,
Speaker 1 15:44
we made it. Well, that's good. I'm
Brandon 15:45
glad that they let you stay there.
Collin 15:47
Yes,
Brandon 15:47
or keep them there and then do that. So that's good. I just looked up, Collin. Hand rake review.
Collin 15:55
Oh,
Brandon 15:56
december 27, 2021. Wow, there you go. Wow! Deep cut. Deep cut. There we go.
Collin 16:03
Insane.
Brandon 16:08
Wedding planning is where we were at that time. Oh my gosh! Boom, boom. Yeah, yeah. There
Collin 16:13
for a while. Brandon. Speaking of things. Oh, I love things. Happy, happy podcast anniversary. Oh, let's go! On this date in 2019,
Speaker 1 16:27
bang,
Collin 16:28
we
Brandon 16:29
innovators.
Collin 16:30
We started. So this is when our first episode released. So we are recording on the anniversary of our first episode release.
Brandon 16:36
Perfect. How exciting! I cannot remember exactly the day because I remember that we like recorded like several episodes early, and then like like we had a backlog for a while. That went away, but it's fine. But like I do, so it's hard. I can't ever remember like when was when was aspirational horse wrangling. That was that turns out turns out
Collin 16:58
August October 15, 2019. So man. happy, great episode.
Collin 17:05
This is a fantastic, great one. They were all great, but that one was. I mean, that's true.
Brandon 17:10
Obviously,
Collin 17:12
maybe I've just been trying to chase that high ever since. Maybe not. Oh my gosh! No, oh good. So yes, happy podcast anniversary!
Brandon 17:34
Dang, amazing, amazing! Look at there. Sneaks up on me every time, every time. Like ah, it should be around here soon somewhere. Where did it go? Oh, oh, here it is. Okay, I have to
Collin 17:50
get having my thing. I like it. Yeah,
Brandon 17:53
like it. It's a surprise that way. There we go. So, yes. So I have not done anything near as exciting as public pumpkin painting. Today was the day of all like every I had like every meeting ever happen today. It was terrible. If I don't understand how people do this like for real, like I don't know how people do this for their actual job because I was about done in seconds. So boring. So I had to beginning right like the curse sometimes of the first hour plan time is that they're like, oh, okay. Well, we're doing meeting like right now. Like, ah, dang. So I had to meet with this lady, and like, well, we're meeting with as like a grade level, right? So it wasn't just me, but like my my grade level people were there too. But about like grading standards and like shenaniganry, like just a bunch of like like stuff, right? Like paperwork and like filling it out and like making sure we have all this stuff. And I'm like, yes, I know I have this, but like take this information that you have, put it in this document. Like, but I don't, but it's already over here. Like, why? This
Collin 19:21
is duplicating effort, right?
Brandon 19:24
It's very ridiculous, right? And so, like, there we have we're gonna have to do like standards based grading stuff or whatever. Like, I don't care, but it's just there's like a lot of like stuff that you have to do before that, and like half of the stuff I already have done, but then there's like these random little things that they're like, "Well, did you do this? I'm like, "What's that? I don't know what that means. This is new and exciting information that I don't know about. So yeah, so we're doing that. So that I had that meeting this morning. So that whatever. I was just going through my binary looking at stuff. Blah blah. Survived it. Survived it. It wasn't so bad, right? It's a little overwhelming because there's like they're like, hey, print off this checklist, and it's like giant, right? But like, it. I assumed, right, that this was the case, but it's not really made clear anywhere. Imagine that-that like this is the checklist that has to be done by the end of the year, right?
Brandon 20:33
So like, yeah, okay, whatever. But like that small aspect was not clearly communicated Super well,
Speaker 1 20:41
sure.
Brandon 20:41
So, like, there was some confusion happening, you know, as there is. But then, I had to go to the most poorly optimized meeting in the history of meetings that could also have been email, right? We had our first interdistrict, intra district rather, intra district,
Collin 21:13
nice
Brandon 21:15
Google Meet call thing.
Collin 21:17
Ooh, ooh, that just that just that got worse the more you say. Yeah,
Brandon 21:22
right. Yeah. Ooh, ooh. It was bad. First of all, first of all, I don't know what what was going on, but like there appeared to be like several people. Like this was not well thought out. Like people were like in the same room for the meeting, on their like laptop things, right? But they all had the meat thing pulled up at the same time. Okay, and so they all had it playing out of their speakers.
Collin 21:53
Oh no!
Brandon 21:55
Oh yeah! And so when somebody would unmute to talk, a horrendous cacophony arose. All the echoey feedback imaginable, like
Collin 22:07
oh,
Brandon 22:09
guys, like I didn't even take mine because I thought we would just pull it up on one.
Speaker 1 22:13
Sure, as you would,
Brandon 22:15
as you would like if we're there was four people in our room. There was the three of us, the science teachers, and then like there was an admin there, just like you know being there, and like the admin had theirs pulled up too. Was like, guys, we don't all need. We can just have one. We just have one. Okay, we just have one. That would be better. That would be optimized. We don't need. You can still have your your laptop. So like, if you need to like look up information, talk about whatever, that's cool. But like we don't all need to be on. They all wanted time. They all
Collin 22:48
wanted. Yeah, they they wanted their own so that they could be playing solitaire. I don't know what they're doing, but like it
Brandon 22:54
was it was bad. Like there would just be like screeching noises and like right. I know not at you know all of them. I know that they're not like podcast professionals that have been doing this all my stuff since 2019. Clearly,
Collin 23:11
clearly,
Brandon 23:11
clearly, but
Collin 23:13
clearly they
Brandon 23:14
they didn't bother to ask me about this.
Brandon 23:18
Yeah, because if I would have come with my, I would have brought my headphones and used them. Like I don't know what we talk about. Like even like I just have like random earbuds in my desk. Like the old ones that like you know they they're like wired. The wired like phone earbuds have little micro. I just would drop that. Like that's good enough for that, right? That's fine. It's good for a Google Meet call, which is not an optimized setup. Anyway, that's anyway. There, like, so that that there there was the logistical dilemma of this. Not to mention that I got there late because I had to talk to you. I was talking. I was in other meeting, right? Oh, the times overlapped wonderfully. Planning, yeah. Why would they do
Collin 24:00
that?
Brandon 24:00
I don't know. Well, because this meeting, the meeting that I was in first period, was like just for sixth grade teachers, right? Okay. And this other meeting started at 9o'clock for some reason, and it was all the science teachers, right? Not even all the science teachers, just me, and then the middle, the other middle school person, and the high school guy, right? But like, it started at nine. I don't know why it started at nine. It's a weird time because the bells, like, just for our bell schedule. I don't know. I guess everybody starts slightly different time, but like our first hour gets over at 905. So like, I was. supposed to be in this other meeting until approximately 905, but this other meeting started at nine, so there was like some weird. Anyway, anyway, I get down there and like I it took me a few minutes to figure out what on earth they were talking about because they were just kind of rambling and like nobody really like. There was like, okay, there was an agenda quote, but it was like the topic of discussion will be blank, right? That's what it was, and so it was like it was the the most exciting topic of how do you choose your priority standards? Oh! Oh man! Oh man! Okay, now this wording of the topic did elicit some confusion because the state of Missouri has recently released their priority standards for science. Okay,
Speaker 1 25:37
the
Brandon 25:37
problem is it's like every science standard.
Collin 25:41
Oh, it's just all of them. Just all of them. Oh, so
Brandon 25:46
like some of the other subjects. There's a few right that are like, but it's just all of first science.
Collin 25:54
That's not how we do this. So,
Brandon 25:56
so the the the topic should have been like, how do you choose like what your major focus is going to be on
Collin 26:01
yeah
Brandon 26:02
right so like the use of the word priority was the priority was doing double duty here where I think it was originally meant for your focus right because like then like some of the other ones they're a little bit like they come up less often or they're like really close to the same as this one. So, like, if you talk about one, you're kind of enveloping the other one already, right? You know what I mean? Like, but other people were like, "Well, no, they're all priority. You have to teach them all. Like, no, that's not
Collin 26:35
how this is stop it. This is your part of the problem.
Brandon 26:39
Oh yeah, yeah. And so, like, and so it it it started there, but that conversation lasted only like a few minutes, right? And I got in there a little bit late, and they wouldn't have started immediately, and so that conversation didn't last particularly long, and then it devolved into like,
Collin 26:58
oh no,
Brandon 27:00
uh, what are some resources that you use to teach science? And it was just like people talking about website subscriptions that their school has bought that they can get worksheets from, and like stuff like that. And I was like, "What? This is not helpful, right? Like there is, like you need to have the like released material things, right? Because like the state has like the map test questions or whatever, and so every once in a while they'd be like, "Hey, here are a bunch of questions that are like questions on the math test or whatever, right? Okay, okay. I need those so that my kids can like see questions that are similar, like worded similarly, or like you know the same like level of question or whatever. Like those are good. I don't mind those, but like, oh, if you use this website, there's like a video and the kids can like do a worksheet thing. I'm like, oh, no, thank you. I'm good on that. I don't need, I don't need that, right? Like, I don't,
Collin 28:13
I don't need another worksheet. Oh yeah,
Brandon 28:16
yeah. I mean, like, you need some sometimes, but like, it's not a lot because that's not the most useful way to like apply knowledge, right? Sometimes it's good for like introductory things, like okay, here's like a it's like a reading thing, and then there's like some like vocabulary stuff, right? This is good for like introducing topics, right? Because like science vocabulary, as we know, is hard because there's just like all kinds of like very strange words that just show up out of nowhere and you're like what these are not words that people use in their everyday conversation these are not real I mean they are real but like we don't talk about you know we don't like I was telling the kids the other day we were talking about magma and lava right and like we were talking about viscosity right and I was like, now in your daily life, you're not going to say, "Oh yes, this is a high viscosity fluid, right? You're going to say, "Oh man, this is pretty thick.
Collin 29:10
Yeah, it's definitely thick.
Brandon 29:11
Like you, so I was just trying. I was like, "Here's the word, but like you're going to say this, but this is the real word, though.
Speaker 2 29:19
Yes,
Brandon 29:19
but it means this word, the Aldo, right? Like, or like, man, this is this is a relatively low viscosity fluid. No, no, you say that's runny or that's thin. That's what you say. That's what you say. Okay, like that's good, but that doesn't need to be a whole like worksheet thing to introduce that concept, right? Which is why tomorrow it's viscosity lab time, and we're gonna do the sauces thing. Oh yeah! Oh, this time I have employed.
Collin 29:54
Oh no!
Brandon 29:55
My students, right? They're they're gonna be they're the middle. Annoyed with me because I was like, "Guys, if you have extra sauce at lunch, bring it to me.
Collin 30:06
They're
Brandon 30:08
like, "What do you want? I was like, "Ketchup, mustard, anything they got, bring it. And they're like, "Why? And I was like, "Just tell them it's for science. It's fine.
Collin 30:16
They ask, but it's fine. You say, "Yes, keep walking,
Brandon 30:20
keep walking, and just say, "Oh, this syrup-it's science syrup now. Sorry, lady, I am commandeering this for science. Commandeering the syrup for science, and so like we-I also had a kid, like we've been talking about that for a couple days, and he shows up and he goes, "Hey, Miss Funkhouser, I got something for you, and he like opens his backpack and just dumps out like a handful of sauce packets from like his house. I was like, "Yes,
Collin 30:48
you perfect
Collin 30:50
bonus points for you.
Brandon 30:51
Yes, you win. There you go. So we have accumulated enough sauce tomorrow for the the annual Viscosity Olympics. Oh yes! Oh yes! With new, new contestants, never before tested in the sixth grade science class viscosity race.
Collin 31:09
Oh my goodness!
Brandon 31:10
I know it is edge of your seat stuff.
Collin 31:13
How I mean, are people already camping outside? I mean, probably
Brandon 31:18
yes. The kids are still confused because I haven't told them what's how the lab works yet. I just told them there would be a lab, and today we practice graphing because we are going to graph our results. But I did not tell them what the plan is. But on let me see. I don't know if I can remember all of them. But tomorrow we have the obligatory ketchup and mustard. Okay,
Collin 31:39
classics,
Brandon 31:40
classic,
Collin 31:40
classics.
Brandon 31:41
Okay, you gotta have ketchup and mustard. It's a known quantity. Okay, from this child's backpack, I have procured Heinz barbecue sauce.
Collin 31:52
Oh, okay. A
Brandon 31:54
never before tested, our first never before tested substance.
Collin 31:58
Now we're talking,
Brandon 31:59
right? I also had some duck sauce left over from when I got egg rolls the other week.
Collin 32:04
Perfect, even better. Yes,
Brandon 32:05
we have cafeteria ranch dressing packets.
Collin 32:12
Ooh, I think I think it's good that they are. It is specifically cafeteria. Yeah,
Brandon 32:18
it's so it's the school whatever the school bot has like school cafeteria packets that some girls gave me because they didn't want the ranch that came with their pizza, and they were like, "Do you? I went. I was walking by the cafeteria after getting the flu shot, and they were like, "Do you need this? And I was like, "I absolutely need that. Give me that right now. They were like, "I was like, you don't need this. Like, no, we don't like that. I was like, "Okay, okay, I don't want to steal it from you, but like, but also if you don't want it, yes. And and a entrant, the last second surprise entrant, right?
Collin 32:48
Oh no,
Brandon 32:49
right, because that was five, yes,
Speaker 1 32:51
yeah,
Brandon 32:52
yes, I think right, ketchup mustard, barbecue sauce,
Collin 32:56
duck sauce,
Brandon 32:57
duck sauce. Oh yeah, ranch. Yes, okay, yeah. Ah, the last second surprise entrant procured to me by my lovely wife at breakfast duty. Syrup packets. Oh,
Collin 33:14
now you're talking.
Brandon 33:16
Oh man, stickiest race ever.
Speaker 1 33:19
But
Brandon 33:20
I think, I think we're gonna be in for some surprises, right? The kids are gonna be shocked. They're gonna be shocked here.
Collin 33:27
No idea what's going. Because
Brandon 33:28
let me tell you what the secret highest viscosity sauce will be on this list. It's mustard. Okay, it's always mustard. It's
Collin 33:38
mustard. They're gonna think it's syrup because syrup is sticky, but they're thinking about syrup after it's been out for a while. Yeah,
Brandon 33:45
yeah, yeah, and the it actually is mustard. Like it is so slow.
Collin 33:51
Isn't that crazy? Yeah,
Speaker 1 33:53
it is nuts. It's
Collin 33:56
great.
Brandon 33:56
Like, I mean, you think about this. This will make sense. This starts to make sense. Like, if you ever squeeze mustard out of a bottle,
Speaker 1 34:05
yeah,
Brandon 34:06
right. Low viscosity fluids don't go and like shoot all over the hot dog. Right. That's not what happens.
Collin 34:14
Yeah, it's not an explosive experience. Mustard doesn't drip. I think if is what you really no? It does not. Yeah, yeah. You don't never go. Boo! It's running. Hold on. Yeah, you do. Yeah, like my
Brandon 34:28
mustard is oozing off. No, it's just like globbed on there, and it's not moving anywhere.
Collin 34:34
Nice. This is exciting. I love this. That is a
Brandon 34:40
plan. It's gonna be it's gonna be good stuff. And so
Collin 34:42
the you do this on an elev like a inclined surface, inclined
Brandon 34:48
plane. So we lay it. We put all of the things I cover. Most important. Okay, important step number one. All right, very important step number one. Cover all surfaces. With trash bag,
Collin 35:00
there you go. Okay, good. Yes. Okay. Boom. All right. This
Brandon 35:03
is the key. Zoom key to victory. Otherwise, otherwise it. Oh no, it goes bad. Okay, and then you can either draw or tape a line on there with painters tape or sharpie. Right. It's usually a good idea to like draw on the start line, but then you can put that painter's tape on the finish line. So there's a clear like, boom, here you go. Sure. Yeah. So we put the globs on there, try to make a relatively even dollops, if you will. They will predict, right, their hypothesis winner, right, which one is going to be the fastest or slowest? You can make either one, right? Because that's what we're testing. So highest viscosity, lowest viscosity, fastest or slowest. Boom, and then we go 321, and then we raise the plane up, and we time. They will all be assigned a sauce to be timekeeper of, and they will go 321, start, and then it will slide down. They will then we will record the time on our data sheet, and it will be lovely and wonderful. Hopefully, and as
Collin 36:15
long as they don't fling the thing away,
Brandon 36:18
I I hold the sauce. I hold the plane. I am in charge of the plane. Ah, okay,
Collin 36:21
okay, okay.
Brandon 36:22
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Because otherwise, that feels like that could be. We could skew the results, right? In any other methodology, right? It could be bad. Could be bad. So, so there we go. It's always hilarious, like because of
Collin 36:40
their reactions because they yeah their reactions
Brandon 36:42
and like their shock at the inability of mustard to move at all anywhere like it
Collin 36:52
yes so we'll
Brandon 36:53
see we'll see who the winner is going to be with our new contestants right last year I did test every Taco Bell sauce, so that was also good, right? Also fun time there, but we'll see tomorrow how it goes. And then importantly, graphing data time, yippee! Right. So we've made some beautiful graphs today. Practiced up a little bit here, and so hopefully we'll be all good to go, and we will do this tomorrow.
Collin 37:39
It's gonna be good, and I can't. I hope so. Yeah, I know. You know, it's. I think it's. I. I know those those things of breaking your expectations of what's of what's about to happen. Oh yeah.
Brandon 37:52
Right.
Collin 37:53
It's it's really good. That's really good. I'm curious to
Brandon 37:56
see how ranch dressing performs and is because I don't think I've actually looked at school ranch dressing, so like I don't know if it's like super goopy ranch or if it's like the thin runny stuff. So we'll have to see. We'll have to see when I spoon it out tomorrow for the thing. So I'm gonna put the whole tub because there's way more ranch than mustard. Obviously, we want to keep it everything fair.
Collin 38:17
Yeah, yeah. So you, yeah, you, yeah, you're measuring it out, so we don't
Brandon 38:21
have mass behind the sliding. Okay, that's the kind of vacation.
Collin 38:24
Nope, nope, nope, nope.
Brandon 38:26
Keep it bare here. So yeah. Anyway, that's tomorrow, and then I oh after school I had another. I had a phone meeting. Man, a lot of people do this. I don't know how you do this all time, Collin. This is killing me. I did. I had three meetings today, and I about I about passed out. So it was tough.
Speaker 1 38:46
But the phone
Brandon 38:48
meeting was I instigated this one. Oh no! This is your
Speaker 1 38:52
fault. Oh no! I know. I know. This is the only one I actually wanted to have.
Collin 38:56
Oh right!
Brandon 38:57
Like I only wanted to have this one. So like, I was I called the lady and was like, "Oh, okay. She was like, "Oh yes, we should talk about this more, but you should just call me. And I was like, "Oh, I started email. I did an email first. I was like, "I'll email and I'll talk about this. Sure. She's like, she's like, "Well, we could just call. I'm like, "Oh, ah, dang it. Okay, not about messed up now. Like, I was like, no,
Collin 39:20
no, I have to actually do this. No,
Brandon 39:26
so at least I did. I did a thing, right? I was like, man, this is tough. One of my kids like having trouble with like vocabulary stuff, and he's having a real hard time because he's an English language guy, right?
Speaker 1 39:40
Sure.
Brandon 39:40
And I was like, man, I just don't really know what else to do. And I was like, oh wait, if only I had gone to the world's most boring conference, but gotten the contact information,
Collin 39:50
yes, from
Brandon 39:51
a woman whose specialty this is.
Collin 39:54
Like, does this
Brandon 39:55
wait? Let me just email this lady.
Collin 39:59
Utilize this. Resource that I have right. Oh, it's in my yeah
Brandon 40:02
yeah. So there we go.
Collin 40:03
That's perfect. So I called
Brandon 40:06
her. She was like, "Whoa, somebody called me. I was like, "Yeah, hi. How are you? It's I. I
Collin 40:11
am. I am a here. Hello.
Brandon 40:14
Yeah, I'm here. Right. So I always had questions about like because she was talking about like scaffolding instruction stuff, right? And so like giving supports for like English language learners in like their native language sometimes like some help stuff to like help transition for like to learn new words from those language, but the the problem is a lot of my children have not had like formal education in their native language, right? And so, like, they don't read Spanish particularly well, so they can like write some. They don't write very, but they can speak Spanish, right? But they can't like read it a lot. I have certain kids that like can't read Spanish. Interesting. So, like, if you're trying to like give them written support in their native language, that's not always useful. No, and
Collin 41:07
probably more confusing and frustrating to them as well. Yeah,
Brandon 41:10
because like I can't read that
Collin 41:11
either. You know, like what? Yeah, this not not helping, right? Yeah. So
Brandon 41:17
like, we just talked about that a little bit. I was like, how do I bridge that gap?
Collin 41:22
Yeah,
Brandon 41:22
because we have a conversational language ability in two languages, and seemingly zero academic language ability. So two different things, right? Two different categories, right? Yes. It's always like so, like because the stuff that she was doing made a lot of sense. Like you can read the words, you can like look at the words, and you use words that are like cognates to like highlight the connections between languages. Like this all makes a lot of sense to me. So if they can't read it, what's the next step? Like what do I do now?
Collin 42:00
Because I I have to dig kind of I'm digging out of basically two issues here, right? Yeah, like to to cross this. Oh, what is it? What what do you do? I I kind of want to know. I I don't know if you can tell or still work. Oh, I
Brandon 42:13
mean, yeah, she was talking about like just being like more um like visual, right? Like having even more visual aids. And she was like, "What do you teach again? I was like, "Science. She was like, "Oh, so you okay? Yeah, you definitely have the visual aids. I was like, "Yeah, I got yes. So like things to learn. Yeah, yeah. I was like, "Don't want you worry. But like making sure that there's like visual connections for the new vocabulary to hook onto, and then like providing sentence stems for them, so that like they can focus on not necessarily writing the whole sentence, not using all their brain power to write the sentence right, but using the words that they've learned, right?
Collin 43:01
Okay,
Brandon 43:02
making connections to the vocabulary, right? So like, for like their practice stuff and things like that. So like, so like, giving them the starters of the sentence to help them to prompt them on which path to go down instead of like trying because like because that for these kids, like it's like you're doing two tasks at the same time. Like you're do you're writing English and writing science simultaneously, right? And so if you can help take away the English part and like do you can you finish the rest of this with the science vocabulary that we learned, then you get a better idea of like, okay, they can follow what's happening because sometimes what happens is they get like stuck because they can't like the English is like too overwhelming, you know, and so then you can be like, okay, now if we can just do the science vocabulary bit or the new science words or whatever, then like that stuff there. So she's gonna send me a bunch of that stuff, just like some basic STEM things, and we talked about some other stuff to try to do. So like, that's what I thought. So I thought I instigated that meeting on purpose. So that was my fault.
Speaker 3 44:16
Yes, but it was by far the
Brandon 44:17
most. It was by far the most productive meeting I had all day. Great,
Collin 44:21
and I guess let me guess. The phone call was like 10 minutes long, maybe. Oh yeah, like a little bit longer. Okay, yeah, exactly. There you go. Like, oh yeah,
Brandon 44:29
1520 minutes, and then that was it. Right, we just talked for a while, and I told her about what I do, and she's like, "Okay, I try adding these things to that. I was like, "Oh, okay, that's good idea. And then, boom, done. Look,
Collin 44:41
so how things are done over here.
Brandon 44:44
Yeah, nice and safe. Right. Yeah. The science meeting is going drug on for like 40 minutes.
Speaker 1 44:54
40 minutes.
Collin 44:57
And how many? I mean, did people look happy? During this meeting, I'm always I'm always wondering about this. Like, did people were people? I didn't look at me. I
Brandon 45:04
know that, but
Collin 45:06
okay.
Brandon 45:07
I don't know. Like, not sure. I'm not really excited about the next one either because they're like, well, what the agenda says? Quote: Talk about experiments you do in class.
Collin 45:19
Oh no,
Brandon 45:20
like I don't.
Collin 45:22
Don't. That's
Brandon 45:23
not helpful. I don't hear about that for
Collin 45:24
that. Just mumble something.
Brandon 45:26
No, I can't. Like, I don't. They're not ready for the insanity that is like my life, right? I can't fully comprehend. Like, I have a hard time explaining like how I think about things and why I do the experiments I do to like a lot of people, and so like I don't like when I was trying to explain, we had a curriculum lady at school for a while, right? And I was asking, I was talking to her about the side quest thing I do, right? And she looked so confused, and I was like, "No, no, look, it's like this and blah blah blah. And I was like, "We're doing this. It's like books on these like engineering standards from this thing, and then we're doing this, and we're doing these projects, and like I need to know like how to. And she was like, "What? Like, no, no, no, it's fine. Like, it's a it's an ongoing thing, and you do like a little bit every day, so it's iterative, right? And you can like keep adding, and you can do more and more, and then you can like talk about like specific like engineering concepts and blah blah blah. And then she was like,
Collin 46:33
she was slowly backing out of the room at that. I mean, yeah, she was going down. I can't remember now
Brandon 46:42
what question I had asked her, but like I got nowhere near any sort of relevant answer to that. She's like, "Well, you could try these things. I'm like, "Bro, I I'm already doing that. Did you not listen? Like, I don't know. Oh my goodness. So, so anyway, yes. So that was whatever. So like, yeah, it's a hard, it's hard thing. I don't know. Like, you just have you have to do experiments that you like that go with the curriculum, right? Because a lot of the science things are like show how this works.
Collin 47:18
Oh, so
Brandon 47:19
guess what? Guess what you got to do. Got to show how it works, right? Like, right. This is why dig holes in the yard, right? Because they're like one of the things is like prove, not prove, but it's like connect like rock formations in an area to the geologic history of that area. So we have to dig them up,
Speaker 1 47:43
yeah, and
Brandon 47:43
look at them, and be like, "Yo, why is there a seashell here? Like, well, you're going to tell you, right? Absolutely, that's what it's not an experiment exactly, but it's an investigation. You know what?
Collin 47:57
It actually, right? It actually is because you're testing like a lot of again going back to breaking some preconceived notions of a lot of experimenting is actually like it's the process of learning something for the first time and but if you don't go looking you're not going to experience that that is true right like like if you're not digging in the dirt you're not going to start putting some things together of like this rock in the backyard of my school has seashells on it.
Speaker 1 48:26
Yeah. Well, why? Like,
Brandon 48:30
what is this? Like,
Collin 48:31
nothing will make people's brains spin faster than like two incongruous things if they're paying attention. Obviously, you know. Oh yeah.
Brandon 48:40
Yes, and that is funny. They're like, like, no, no, that is a seashell. They're like, uh, wait, what? Like a, like a seashell? Like, yeah,
Collin 48:48
yeah, yep,
Brandon 48:49
yeah. They're like, wait, hold on, I don't.
Collin 48:52
Yep, like, I know, I know. It's okay. I'm glad you're sitting down. Yeah, we have we have things to talk about.
Brandon 48:58
Yeah, it's gonna be great. Hold on! Look at this animation that I have on this website. Behold, behold, Missouri underwater. So yeah, I think I think that it sounds yeah. Again, it was like you know when they were talking about it at the other conference, it was like, "Oh yeah, well, it's just like, you know, people. There's like the classics of science class experiments, right? Like the strawberry DNA thing, right? Whatever, and there's like these things, but like, I mean, that's cool, but like, you know, not for certain things, right? You can only do that so much. Like, what are you gonna do for this, right? Like, you just gotta like go for it, right? And just you know, gotta come up with a weird paper towel experiments. What you gotta do, right? You have to test our school paper towels better or worse than random. Store brand paper towels.
Collin 50:01
Answer. Yeah,
Brandon 50:02
yeah. No, they're not. But
Collin 50:05
that's okay. Actually,
Brandon 50:07
conflicting results on the report this year. I don't know if I told you this. For absorption, clearly worse. Right, far and away worse. For strength testing, better.
Collin 50:21
Oh, interesting!
Brandon 50:22
Yes,
Speaker 1 50:23
yes, for
Brandon 50:24
like durability while scrubbing, or in this case, being soaking wet and getting marble stacked on top of it. Far stronger than store brand paper towels. Yes, yes, probably because of the cheap weave of the fiber, but so soak up water. Absolutely not. Not tear when wet. Right. Shockingly. Yes. Like I
Collin 50:55
also yes.
Brandon 50:58
Another surprise conclusion Here,
Collin 51:05
weren't expecting that.
Brandon 51:07
I know. So other than that, now that my meeting days are over, now I just have to get ready for horrible meeting. I may not be available next Thursday because it's oh, it's parent teacher conference day. Wait, oh. Oh
Speaker 4 51:22
yeah. Okay.
Brandon 51:24
Amazing. All
Collin 51:25
that. We need to gotta work on. We gotta actually schedule this. Yeah,
Brandon 51:30
yeah. Because like, a conference once again, once again, somehow, parent teacher conferences, 1p.m. to 7p.m.
Collin 51:43
No,
Brandon 51:44
what?
Collin 51:44
Not okay.
Brandon 51:45
What? I'm going to the calendar meeting this year, and I'm going to say, who wants this? Do people like this? What is happening? Yeah. Why is this a thing? This is terrible. A half day of school. Okay. First of all, you were talking to me about like we need to make sure we're optimizing instructional time, and you give me a half day of school, bro. Come on, no,
Collin 52:10
yep,
Brandon 52:10
and then six hours of parent teacher conferences, of which only two of those hours parents will be in my room.
Collin 52:20
That's too much. Too much. Yes,
Brandon 52:23
it's too much because they only still last year we did that and they still only came from five to seven. Like when?
Collin 52:27
Yeah. See, that's the problem.
Brandon 52:39
Like, but I know that there are some parents that like cannot come because of work hours, but from like you know the traditional we used to do like 330 to seven, right? There are some parents that cannot make that right, but that number is like small compared to all of the people that get off work at 5o'clock, right? Like that is like, and the people that can't make it because they work like nights aren't coming in earlier, right? Because they're going to work at five, so like they're still not coming. So like it doesn't.
Collin 53:19
Yeah, that's the problem,
Brandon 53:20
you know. Like they're they work second shift, right? I don't think some people in school administrative know that like second shift is still like you know like 1o'clock in the afternoon to like 8o'clock at night, right? These are they have no like you know like to nine at night, right? That that's a second shift in a factory. It's like two to 10 or like one to nine or something like that. Like that's the second shift. So that is also exactly when we would be there. So like I don't know what you. Yeah, tell
Collin 53:59
me, tell me people don't fully understand who they're serving without. I know,
Brandon 54:04
right? Like these are factory shift times. Like I don't, I don't know what you're talking about. Like there, you have the five to five shift, you have the the like the six to like what two or whatever. Like you've got like these are there's all these weird shift times for factories. Like there's very strange times, but almost none of them are serviced by doing your parent teacher covers from one to seven because they're either still working for most of that time and have got off and then are like ready to go home and eat, or like are actively working during those hours.
Collin 54:43
Yeah,
Brandon 54:44
you know what I mean.
Collin 54:45
Yeah, yeah, and and and yet they're like, this is the perfect time. It's like it's no, that's not, it's not. What
Brandon 54:52
do you guys? No, it's not. It's
Collin 54:54
not the perfect time for literally anyone, right? No, I don't. Yeah,
Brandon 54:57
I don't know who this is the time for, right? Like. I other parents that work at the school can come, like cool. They're already there.
Speaker 1 55:09
Yeah,
Brandon 55:10
they already email me. Like I don't care. Like
Collin 55:13
congratulations! It's you made it. You made you you're fitting the the school schedule. Actually, is what you just done. Congratulations! Made
Brandon 55:20
yourself be able to come. Yeah,
Collin 55:22
glad we're you person that
Brandon 55:24
was here already.
Collin 55:25
Yes, yeah, you, you, you, dear wonderful person who had no concern or issues getting here in the first. Yeah,
Brandon 55:31
and could talk to me at any time you wanted. Any time because school emails are standardized, and you could just email me, and it's fine. Like whatever, I don't know.
Speaker 1 55:45
I don't know.
Brandon 55:46
So we'll see how that goes.
Speaker 1 55:48
Yeah.
Brandon 55:49
And we we have a smaller number of kids this year anyway, so I'm predicting boredom. Um.
Collin 55:58
Well, hey, you know what? Maybe we can podcast from school. How about that? That way, I would love that a live, a live broadcast of school about about how it's going, and we just stop whenever I'll just go and hold whenever somebody pause. Somebody actually shows up. Excellent. Oh yeah,
Brandon 56:16
set timer. See how actual long it took. But so yeah. So that's next week. So we gotta just like cram a bunch of stuff because then it'd be like some good day off after that. So at least we don't have to come to school Friday, go to school Friday after. But like, still boring, bad. I don't know. I think the best time we ever had conferences. This is just a me personally problem. Like we used to do conferences Monday night and Tuesday night, like 330 to 630, right? So you have two nights, 336, 31. year it was really great because we had a bunch of kids who were like, "Hey, half the children Monday, half Tuesday. But if you have to switch, no biggie, no problem. Just come on in, right? It's whatever. Like, but it was nice, and not that you just let people come a few times, and then you go, boop, go home, boom, it's fine. Don't worry about it. I was one to seven shenanigans. This is ridiculous.
Collin 57:16
Well, you know, yeah, it's it's how many how many times a year is it? You know,
Brandon 57:25
twice,
Collin 57:25
twice.
Brandon 57:26
But you know, the the truth, yeah, the the logic, you know, it always works out that like all the people that do come are the people that I don't really need to talk to, right? They're just like, oh, how's my kit night? Fine, you're fine. Like, how's that? Fine. Like, if you've heard from me already, like, if they were doing bad things, you would. I would. I called you. They're fine. Like, I don't.
Collin 57:51
Yeah,
Brandon 57:52
good dude, right here. You could look at their thing over here. Boom. Have them explain to you about this weird thing they just built the other day. Boom. They go. Goodbye. See you later. But like, I don't know. So see you
Speaker 5 58:03
later.
Brandon 58:03
Yeah. Bye. Ah, ah. One more thing before we wrap up here.
Collin 58:11
Oh yeah.
Brandon 58:11
I have finally.
Collin 58:12
Oh,
Brandon 58:13
I have finally done a thing, Collin. This is a very random thing, but anytime I get to talk about this, I'm gonna do it, as you know, right?
Speaker 1 58:22
Yes.
Brandon 58:22
I have, right? I need. I. I. I told you I needed a break from all this like insane sci-fi reading that I've been doing. Okay. So I've my in my own personal time, right? I was like, oh, I'm gonna have this random murder mystery book here, right? Apparently, we talk about this later, but like apparently the specific Japanese style murder mystery novel is very unique experience, very interesting, right? It's all about clues and like it's very like putting together pieces of things, right? So it's very cool. So I'm back to the roots crime mystery novel, but right and only I don't normally like a not like a spooky horary person, you know what I mean. But this isn't necessarily that. But I did finally succumb to the urge to buy a book. I find I used one on Thrift Books for very cheap. Hashtag not sponsored.
Speaker 1 59:17
Oh,
Brandon 59:18
but it feels very fall to me.
Collin 59:22
Okay, so
Brandon 59:23
I'm going to read Eaters of the Dead.
Collin 59:27
Eaters of oh my gosh! Okay, this is
Brandon 59:29
the basis for one of my favorite movies of all time, The 13th Warrior. So this is Michael Crichton's book.
Collin 59:39
Oh my gosh, I had no idea.
Brandon 59:43
Yes, so this the movie my my beloved 13th Warrior.
Collin 59:48
Okay,
Brandon 59:49
which is this weird movie that I latched onto, and I think it's very. I like it. It's Michael Crichton's book.
Speaker 1 59:54
Yeah, it's
Brandon 59:55
based on Eaters of the Dead, which Michael Crichton, uh, basically when. He was like this. Is one of the first things he wrote, like when he was quite young, right? He took two things, two like well established like historical things, and smashed them together to make Eaters of the Dead, right? One of these, well, maybe not. One historical work that he based it on is Beowulf. Oh, right. Okay. So, like the Grindel stuff in Beowulf was one of his inspirations for this. Oh,
Collin 1:00:34
interesting.
Brandon 1:00:36
Right. And the other is a book that I happen to be holding in my hand that I read part of this summer, this is Ibn Fadalan and the Land of Darkness, Arab travels in the far north.
Collin 1:00:51
Oh, far north of what?
Brandon 1:00:53
Russia. So in 900 something, right? A guy from Baghdad ventured north through modern-day Russia to meet with the Khazar people, right? And so, this guy, whose name is the opening line of this book, is Ahmad. I'm going to butcher this. I'm so sorry, all of my Arab friends. Ahmad ibn Fadalan al Abbas ibn Rashid Ibn Hamud. Boom! This is Antonio Banderas' character, right? So this is like a real historical travel log of this guy's journey from Baghdad to the Khazar lands of Caspian Sea Russia area. So like the opening part of the 13th Warrior, where the guy is traveling north, and he finds the Viking, the Rus, and he witnesses like the Viking funeral and all the stuff. That part really happened, right? So that is all. I mean, based on this book, and that is all some historical event. And then the part where he goes back home with them to like fight against the monster was the part inspired by Beowulf.
Collin 1:02:24
Oh, that's crazy!
Speaker 1 1:02:26
Yeah, yeah.
Collin 1:02:27
I okay. Well, and and when did he write this book?
Brandon 1:02:35
Ah, this is one of his early ones. I can't. Let me see. Like it's not within grabbing right now, but like, no, that's not how I can't. What am I doing? What is this? I can't spell apparently. My fat fingers don't allow me to type quickly. Sometimes.
Speaker 1 1:03:04
Boom. Uh, 1976.
Collin 1:03:08
Wow. Okay. Yeah. So very
Brandon 1:03:11
early Michael Crichton stuff here.
Collin 1:03:14
That's wild.
Brandon 1:03:16
Yeah, and I've never actually. Oh, I've only ever read one other Michael Crichton book. Uh, and so like, I don't really have a good grasp on Michael Crichtonineness, you know. And he's like, I like I've watched Jurassic Park, obviously, and I've seen movies based on his books, but I've only ever read one other of his books, right? And it's one of the ones that was published posthumously, right? Like right after he died, it was like the pirate one. Can't remember. There's a pirate kind of like a fictiony, like fantasy piratey thing that was published after he died. It's kind of weird. And then like I read that. That's the only one. So I've read the apparently the most niche one ever, and now I'm going to read my my fall reading plan includes Eaters of the Dead. Very exciting! Very excited because I love the 13th Warrior for unknown reasons. Really, I don't know why I latched onto this movie as a child, but like I just
Collin 1:04:15
it's gonna be great. I'm really excited. It's one of those
Brandon 1:04:17
that you're like, yes, yeah. So every time, anytime I have a chance to talk about 13th Warrior. I'm going to do it. Clearly, Antonio Banderas is best role, right? Oh,
Speaker 1 1:04:28
absolutely.
Brandon 1:04:30
Susan will disagree with me because she's a desperado girly, but you know that's fine. I'll take that. I'll take a second best role. It's okay. So that's why. So I didn't. I didn't know if you knew about this like very bizarre mashup that Michael Critch was like. Yes, I'm gonna write this, a hybrid between this actual historical thing and what if Beowulf? And
Collin 1:04:54
yeah, no, I had no idea that this was a thing at all. I am. And I am very interested to hear where this fold out for you. Yeah,
Brandon 1:05:06
so we'll see how it goes. I got I got another book I'm in the middle of right now, but like that is on the docket. It's up next, right? Because I was like, no, I mean, when you find a book like this online for $5, what are you gonna do?
Collin 1:05:20
You gotta take it. Buy
Brandon 1:05:21
it. That's what you're gonna do. We're gonna do it.
Collin 1:05:23
Yes. Yeah. $5.
Brandon 1:05:25
Long live the mass market paperback. That's what I'm saying. Right. That's what we're doing.
Collin 1:05:28
Ta da! This is also a reminder that I just heard that we need narrow our our our book. We do. We do for this. I was
Brandon 1:05:37
looking the list list the other day and I I couldn't really catch any vibes, so even if you have like vibes or genre that you're like feeling, right? Like, let me know. We can kind of work from there, because you know I don't really know. I don't really know what
Collin 1:05:53
that's where what
Brandon 1:05:55
the vibe is right now. What is it going to be?
Collin 1:05:57
Yeah. But yeah, I will. I will. I will.
Brandon 1:06:00
Okay. Okay. Sounds good.
Collin 1:06:02
Okay. My goodness. Oh.
Brandon 1:06:06
All right. Somewhere is a haiku to end us on.
Collin 1:06:10
Oh no. A
Brandon 1:06:11
haiku for you. Ta-da! All right. I believe it will be painfully obvious what the subject of this haiku was, but it did capture my feelings quite well. So seconds ticking by,
Speaker 1 1:06:30
but mouths continue to move. Students forced to wait. Oh no! Yeah, who
Collin 1:06:47
knows what that was about? No, nobody knows. How would we break the code? Yeah, nobody knows. Yeah, yeah, completely clueless. Yeah,
Brandon 1:07:00
it's mystery. I did also tell. I asked. Well, I I just told like the high school principal was the principal was there with us, and I was like, okay. I didn't phrase it quite like this. I was a bit more diplomatic, but I was like, hey, look, cool that we're meeting. Like, if we're gonna spend all this time, all of my class time, meeting with teachers from other school districts, do you think maybe it would be possible this year in some of our PD times to carve out a little bit of time that we can just talk to the teachers in our own school district? You think that'd be a good idea? Like, can we do that? Like, gosh, golly,
Collin 1:07:36
what a weird thing! I
Brandon 1:07:39
didn't phrase it like that, right? But that's how I was feeling in my heart. I was like, "You're gonna make me miss class time to talk to these other people, and I'm not gonna have any time during the year to talk to these two people sitting next to me. Like, I think that would be much more beneficial to my life than random lady on the internet, like I don't know, so
Collin 1:08:03
anyway, anyway, okay, cool, cool. Well,
Brandon 1:08:07
only three more of those this year.
Collin 1:08:08
Oh man, we're gonna keep getting better.
Brandon 1:08:12
Oh, I don't think that's true.
Collin 1:08:13
Fine wine.
Brandon 1:08:16
Yeah, very
Collin 1:08:18
bad. Oh man. Well, okay. Well, lots to look forward to. I hopefully by next time I will be better. Okay, you know, get
Brandon 1:08:29
some vitamin C.
Collin 1:08:30
I'm gonna go heavily dose compress.
Brandon 1:08:34
I don't know.
Collin 1:08:35
Oh no!
Brandon 1:08:36
Salt water gargling. Are we ready for that yet, or not far enough yet for that? Zinc tablets. I don't
Collin 1:08:42
know. Vinegar and honey.
Brandon 1:08:44
Susan will give you the vinegar and honey recipe. I
Collin 1:08:46
need your vinegar and honey. I need to do it all. All right. We can get past this. Let's go. Okay. Good luck. I love you.
Brandon 1:08:55
Love you too. Bye. Bye