Brandon is doing Greek things. Collin said goodbye to a car.

The most Greek way
Quote of the week!

“Be quiet your supposed to be dead”

Broad brush strokes of lower elementary teachers
Farmer Collin
Homestead maxing
Donating a car
schrodinger's car
Collin’s haiku

Engine quiet now
Chairs carry our stories on
Grateful for the miles

Check out our other episodes: ohbrotherpodcast.com

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A VERY ROUGH TRANSCRIPT OF THE EPISODE

PROVIDED BY OTTER.AI

SUMMARY KEYWORDS

homesteading, device turn-in, Greek mythology presentations, field day, chicken coop, car donation, ribbon cutting, Chamber of Commerce, summer reading book, State Fair draft, urban farming, classroom projects, transition time, lower elementary teachers, chicken yoga

SPEAKERS

Speaker 1, Speaker 2, Brandon, Collin Funkhouser, Speaker 4, Speaker 3

Speaker 1 00:00

Collin,

Collin Funkhouser 00:05

welcome to Oh brother, a podcast where we try to figure it all out with your hosts, Brandon and Collin on this week's show, homestead, maxing, ahoy. I am, well, how about yourself? I'm hanging in, hanging on, right? You know, yeah.

Brandon 00:34

Well, it's like the last week of school is next week. So it's like, wild, finish, Finish, finish. Ah, like, we gotta, like, how I got a couple things I gotta finish up. We had testing this week,

Speaker 1 00:50

which,

Brandon 00:51

again, why we put it on the second to last week of school. That was a plan that somebody had

Collin Funkhouser 00:56

nothing's going on the second week, the second to last week of school.

Brandon 00:59

Oh, yeah.

Brandon 00:59

And the testing window isn't, like, super long or anything. No, it's fine. It doesn't open

Collin Funkhouser 01:06

easily.

Brandon 01:07

March right

Speaker 2 01:10

leg, base of the calendar, whatever. It's

Collin Funkhouser 01:13

your fault for not being better, actually.

Brandon 01:17

Yeah. So I don't really know what that's all about, but whatever we're done, we're all done. We got it bang. So it's fine. It's fine. But yeah, so we got big things tomorrow, so we got a lot to get ready for, because I was trying to make because the other thing we have to work around, to think about, is device turn in Tuesday.

Collin Funkhouser 01:44

Ooh,

Brandon 01:44

right. So I have to make sure all of our presentations and stuff are done before that.

Speaker 2 01:52

Yeah, right.

Brandon 01:53

And so I we're doing them tomorrow, and if we have any that don't get in, we'll do a Monday,

Collin Funkhouser 02:01

okay,

Brandon 02:02

right? That way we don't have to wait till Tuesday. So they don't have, like, they, because we'll have tournament in the morning on Tuesday. So, like, if they, I don't want them to have to turn in their devices and then do their presentation after that, right?

Speaker 1 02:17

They

Collin Funkhouser 02:17

wouldn't do that, because

Brandon 02:20

there's always, like, last minute changes, you know? And like, I gotta add, I'm gonna add this real quick, right? We can't do that if we've turned in all of our stuff. No. So

Collin Funkhouser 02:31

no,

Brandon 02:32

boo.

Collin Funkhouser 02:33

But that also just means even more of a time crunch for you.

Brandon 02:39

Yeah, and so, and we're not, we're presenting in social studies class, which is in the afternoon.

Collin Funkhouser 02:46

Okay,

Brandon 02:47

so, like, that's not good. I mean, I guess at the end of the year, there's no real rules. I could technically present whenever I wanted, and nobody would care. But like, nobody

Speaker 1 03:00

would care.

Brandon 03:01

Just for consistency sake, I do like to make sure that we're doing some things, but tomorrow morning we will do, like, a little bit of science stuff with some wrap up things, and then I'm going to let them work on their presentations.

Collin Funkhouser 03:14

Okay, get that time kind of in class to, yeah,

Brandon 03:17

in the morning to kind of go over things and practice and double check and make sure we got stuff

Speaker 1 03:22

Brandon 03:22

it's gonna be good. We are doing Greek mythology presentations, right? And so I've decided that the most Greek way to share a presentation about mythology is to act out a story.

Collin Funkhouser 03:43

Yes, that's the, actually, the you say it's the most Greek way. It's the only Greek way. I

Brandon 03:52

mean, yeah, for for a group of people, that was like, Yes, how about we invent a theater? I really feel like it's the best way to do it, right, right? Secretly, this is my plan, right? Because, like when we do Mesopotamia, they have to build and design their own cities,

Speaker 1 04:13

right?

Brandon 04:15

Because that was a Mesopotamian thing,

Speaker 1 04:17

right?

Brandon 04:18

In in ancient Egypt, they have to build and design their own tomb, right? Because it's a Egyptian thing,

Collin Funkhouser 04:27

yeah, weirdly, the most important thing

Brandon 04:30

you could do in ancient Egypt was die and, you know, awkward, and so I figure this is the most Greek thing that we can do. We if we perform in front of the class, right? The first year that I did this, I didn't make them like perform it, because I was like, I don't know if they'll be into that. I don't know if they'll like it. No. Wrong, wrong. 100% wrong, wrong. They love it. So

Brandon 04:59

they.

Collin Funkhouser 05:00

Loved it.

Brandon 05:00

Almost everybody loves it. So almost there's always, like, somebody who like, doesn't like to be up there, but they get to do it with like groups. So like, even if you're a person who, like, doesn't like to be in charge, you like, you don't like to present, and for the class, you can have a thing to do, right? You can take a couple lines, or, like, you can be in charge of the slideshow, because I have one one group, their whole slideshow is just, they're using the slideshow as background scenery for the play, right? So it's like, let's go to the mountain. Click, mountain, right? Like, here we are in our workshop. Boom, workshop.

Collin Funkhouser 05:40

That's a very odd you know what? Kudos to them. I understand that is a fantastic use.

Brandon 05:46

Yeah, I like this plan.

Speaker 1 05:47

Yes,

Brandon 05:48

I like this plan. We kind of came up with it because they're like, Well, I don't know what to put on the back. I know what to do. And I was like, Well, what you could do is, this is a thing people have done before. And one of the kids was like,

Speaker 2 06:00

yes, yes, we're doing that.

Collin Funkhouser 06:03

And set the scene, set the scene,

Brandon 06:06

and say, run right. So like,

Speaker 1 06:09

Yes, this is an excellent

Brandon 06:13

these are going to be kind of epic. And again, I like this project because this is, this is where some people get mad at me, because they're like, Mr. Funkhouser, you did not tell me exactly what to do. Oh, yeah, yes, that's right, I did not. You're welcome. And then they're like, Well, what if I do this and I just go, yes? They're like, really, I can do Yes. Like, yes. Like, I don't,

Collin Funkhouser 06:43

it's that I see this every now and then where I go, you know, turns out you can just do things. And sometimes it's okay, right? Yeah.

Brandon 06:53

So, like, you can be as silly as you want. Like, can you just, like, completely go ham and, like, just act out to the nines and like, overact and be dramatic. Yes, finally, you'll get to use that sixth grade special skill of being overly dramatic. We're gonna put it to good use, right? We're gonna funnel that into a thing.

Collin Funkhouser 07:16

It's what you've always wanted people.

Speaker 1 07:19

It is, right?

Brandon 07:21

This, this, this activity does, however, give us our sixth grade quote of the week. And so I feel like I'm just gonna throw it in right now instead of waiting to the end of the show. Okay, we'll start off strong here. Oh

Collin Funkhouser 07:33

man,

Brandon 07:34

it's just on topic. Right? On topic. So we'll go with this right? Ready? Okay, it is Be quiet. You're supposed to be dead.

Collin Funkhouser 07:56

Coming up together, right?

Brandon 07:58

Yeah, all right. They're doing this group is doing the story of Orpheus and Eurydice, right? So if you're not familiar, the short version is, Orpheus is like a poet, songwriter, right? And Eurydice is his muse, and like wife, and he loves her very much. And then get married, and then, oh no, she gets bit by snake, oh and dies, right? And she goes to the underworld. Oh no. Sad face, oh

Speaker 1 08:23

no.

Brandon 08:24

And then Orpheus goes to look for her, to try to bring her back to the land of the living. And then Haiti shows up. He's like, Yo, what are you doing here? You can't be here. Get out. How'd you get past the dog? What's going on here? And then he's like, Oh, I came from my life, because I love her and, like, weirdly, out of all of the three, like major brother figures in Greek mythology, like Zeus, Poseidon, Hades, Hades, contrary to popular belief, actually the most chill out of all of them. And he's like, Yeah, but again, we have the classic Greek thing, right? He gives them the task. He's like, Okay, I'll let you walk out of here. But basically says you cannot turn around and look back, otherwise she will be taken from you forever, right? And basically, Orpheus is a moron, and he gets up to the surface, almost out. He like, he's like, he's like, he basically turns around and be like, Look, we made classic, classic, right? That's the very a British version that the kids will tell smile, but like, the girl was like, back like, when she goes to the end world, she's like, hiding it in the back of the room, but she was back there, like giggling and like telling them what to do, and like the narrator. Person was like, Hey, shut up. You're supposed to be

Speaker 3 09:49

dead.

Brandon 09:51

Because some other groups they like, they will have three people, and one person will be the narrator, and then the other two people just like, act. What's happening, sure, that's also really hilarious. Like, sure, and they'll have lines and stuff. They'll be like, one time, one group was they like, did it really good? They were like, but as he walked into the room, he said, and then the character talked, right?

Collin Funkhouser 10:17

It was practice.

Speaker 1 10:19

I know they wrote scripts. They write their own scripts and everything,

Collin Funkhouser 10:22

really,

Brandon 10:22

yeah, yeah. So they research it, they look it up. They watch, like, I let them watch videos about it, or like, because then you can get, like, the more abridged version of the story that cuts out sometimes, like video versions cut out, like, the questionable parts of they'll be like, and then he did this, we try to cut out any story involving too much Zeus, because then there's, like, super inappropriate things happening, right?

Speaker 1 10:51

Because

Brandon 10:51

he's terrible, but like,

Collin Funkhouser 10:52

too much Zeus,

Brandon 10:54

yeah, it's fine. So that they like, have to research the whole thing themselves. They have to come up with how they're going to present it. They work on all the stuff. It's pretty good. It's fine, it's fun. It's a good end of the year thing. And somebody was like, why don't we do this more throughout the year? And I'm like, I told one of them, I was like, because in second quarter you could not have done this. Like, there is no way. And there's absolutely no way I'm letting a first quarter sixth grader do anything like this. No way. No sir,

Collin Funkhouser 11:28

we gotta. This is something we gotta work up to,

Brandon 11:32

yeah, you kind of, you have to, like, the way that I think about it is, like, we start off much more structured, right? And then, like, much more, like, rigorous, like, Okay, I need you to have all of these things, do this, do it exactly like this. And then, like, towards the end of the year, I'm like, you know, go for it. Like,

Brandon 11:53

especially

Brandon 11:54

with the presentations, like I show them, I start showing them, like, examples of other ones that people have done in the past. They're like, really good, you know? I'm like, you know you could do this

Collin Funkhouser 12:05

how to, but also not

Brandon 12:09

gonna tell you how to. But I have this other presentation that is this, this person got 100% on theirs. I'm gonna show you what it looks like. Yeah, right. And every once a while I will, like, redact. I'll, like, copy the person, just, like, erase all the names off of it, and be like, this person did not get an A. Like, if they get an A, I'll be like, yeah, it was this person. Like, I'll show it, whatever. But if it's like, really bad, like, I'll erase the names and be like,

Collin Funkhouser 12:37

sure

Brandon 12:38

this person did not get an A right? You see these random SpongeBob memes in this presentation? They lost the point for every single one they put in here. Once you know that like, because I explicitly told them to not

Brandon 12:55

do that,

Brandon 12:56

and they weren't on topic. If it's a meme, it's on topic. We'll let it slide. We

Collin Funkhouser 13:00

can't,

Brandon 13:01

right? We'll let it slide. I've been showing them Greek mythology memes now that are school appropriate, because now they get it and it's hilarious, right? Like, the Hey, it's Pandora. Welcome to my unboxing video like that. Just like, put it on the board while they're working, and they'll come in and be like, Oh, I get it. Like,

Collin Funkhouser 13:22

like, Ah, see. And

Brandon 13:25

a couple of them are about the stories that we're doing, and so, like, I don't get that one is like, you will just wait, wait till, wait till that kid does their presentation. You'll get it.

Collin Funkhouser 13:37

Oh my gosh, yeah, all this look. It's all gonna come out.

Brandon 13:42

It's hilarious. So I got,

Collin Funkhouser 13:46

I like that.

Brandon 13:47

It's fun. So so we're gonna try to make it through that, and then make it through the last week of school, next week, which does include field day at some point, the most hated and cursive days, distressingly, I've had, I've received zero information about field day so far, other than the day it is happening. That's all I have. Um, I have nothing else.

Collin Funkhouser 14:14

I don't think that's so particularly good.

Brandon 14:16

I mean, it's a plan.

Collin Funkhouser 14:18

Well,

Brandon 14:18

now it like, ostensibly, it works the same pretty much every time,

Collin Funkhouser 14:28

right? Doesn't, though? Yeah,

Brandon 14:29

this is a problem, right? Like, the number of like stations slash events does fluctuate right? And so that means the amount of minutes that I must be at a certain place fluctuates. And so like, like, I broadly know what's happening. Like, go over here, there will be things on the baseball field. Follow around? Will the kindergarten teachers get off the schedule and be in the wrong spot absolutely every time?

Collin Funkhouser 15:08

We can't help it,

Brandon 15:12

right? I think, Okay, this is my rant about lower elementary teachers.

Collin Funkhouser 15:16

Lower

Brandon 15:18

elementary teachers, just in my experience,

Collin Funkhouser 15:22

we want to go here, okay,

Brandon 15:24

as a whole,

Collin Funkhouser 15:24

as a whole,

Speaker 1 15:26

Brandon 15:27

you tell them,

Collin Funkhouser 15:27

broad strokes, yeah,

Brandon 15:29

broad strokes, here. Okay. So if you are a lower elementary school teacher, feel free to respond, okay, because here's my hypothesis, right? Because a lot of lower elementary like, the schedule is, like, very in flux all the time, right? Like, it's not rigidly set. There's no bell schedule. There's no like, whatever, right? So, like, if you tell somebody this starts at, like, I don't know, nine, right? They will sort of, kind of leave their room at nine o'clock,

Speaker 1 16:10

right?

Collin Funkhouser 16:10

Yeah. Like,

Brandon 16:11

this happens at our school all the time, where it's like, we had a assembly the other day, and it started at two, right? So I left my classroom 10 minutes before two o'clock to get all the way over there to get everybody sitting, seated down and like in the spot, right? We were the first people in there. Oh, and right, everybody else. One of the some of the classes showed up. They walked in the door at two o'clock.

Collin Funkhouser 16:42

Oh, that's not good. Oh,

Brandon 16:44

that's not

Speaker 1 16:47

what

Brandon 16:49

we started it too. What are you doing? Yeah. Why are you doing this? And so this happens at field day a lot, like,

Speaker 1 16:55

there'll

Brandon 16:56

be like, lunches at here, and then the next event is here, right? And it's like, 30 minute break, right? Boom. And then lunch, or sometimes it's an hour, right? It's just like, whatever, and, but, but what they'll do is they'll take a longer lunch break, because, like, the like, sometimes it's like 30 minutes. You take 30 minutes for lunch and you go out, you do it. It's fine, whatever. You go get your sack lunch. You go sit down for a while, but you come back out. No biggie, right? But they'll take longer for lunch than they should have taken, because their kids need more time to do stuff. But then they'll come back to the station that they should have been at after lunch, but they've already missed one or two rotations, right? So it always works really good until lunchtime. And then lunchtime really screws everybody up, because it'll be like, Oh, at two you start at your next station at, what not to like at like, 130 or 1230 right? At 1230 you start at your new place at, but they'll like be done with lunch at 1230

Speaker 1 18:01

and

Brandon 18:02

then they'll, like, clean up, and then they'll go to the bathroom. Then they'll mosey on down, and then they'll be like, confused. If there's somebody at that station, like, bro, you missed the boat. You gotta be over there. Like, you don't miss

Collin Funkhouser 18:13

we are just a few steps in front of you at this

Speaker 1 18:18

point.

Brandon 18:18

You done messed up. So you scoot ahead and you do whatever, but like every time it happens, they screw it up every time. And I think it's because they don't have a very, like, a super rigid schedule all the time like they have, they can kind of do. They have a lot more built in transition time,

Collin Funkhouser 18:39

yeah, just

Brandon 18:40

in their daily life, because they're smaller kids and they need more transition time, right?

Collin Funkhouser 18:44

Yeah.

Brandon 18:44

But when you try to wedge them into a event where the transition time is like two minutes,

Brandon 18:53

that doesn't work, right? Like they don't think about that.

Collin Funkhouser 18:57

No, they don't, well, yeah, because they're not, they're not primed for that, are they? No,

Brandon 19:03

but, and I mean, they normally don't need to

Brandon 19:06

be, right? Which is fair, like in their normal environment, you know, if their instruction time is an hour, but they need, like, an hour and 20 minutes, you know, they can cut a little time from this thing today, a and they can do a little extra tomorrow, right? It's like, very it's a self contained classroom. So like,

Speaker 1 19:24

Yeah,

Brandon 19:24

as long as you get done whatever, it doesn't matter, right? They have the freedom and the leeway to do that to and in, again, in their self contained world, this is fine, right? But then, when you interact with me, who has a extremely rigid schedule,

Speaker 1 19:45

right? Like,

Brandon 19:47

I can't take 30 minutes from one of my classes and stick it somewhere else,

Collin Funkhouser 19:52

sure that

Brandon 19:53

30 minutes is just gone forever?

Collin Funkhouser 19:55

Yeah, you're not gonna write back to you and

Brandon 19:57

it like screws my whole day up. Because really now all three. The hours of my classes are screwed up because I missed 30 minutes from this one class,

Speaker 1 20:04

right?

Brandon 20:05

Like, this is a sentence that does not compute to a like, second grade teacher

Speaker 1 20:12

that's

Brandon 20:12

fair, which, again, this is, this is a different environment, right? And so they don't live in this world of, like, hyper rigidity that I do where I but like, they don't have that. They have more freedom to like, be like, more malleable, malleable. I mean,

Speaker 1 20:30

yes,

Brandon 20:31

but it's when it events like this, when our two worlds collide, I get grumpy,

Collin Funkhouser 20:39

well, because

Brandon 20:41

I'm doing the right thing, and then,

Collin Funkhouser 20:43

yeah, yeah, cuz you're you're ready for something, right, and you're trying to accomplish the goal and operate how you have been operating. So it's a little different,

Brandon 20:57

yeah, so we'll see. We'll see how it

Speaker 1 21:01

goes.

Brandon 21:01

Maybe they'll get it right this time. I'm gonna bring it up to the coach, though. Look, yeah, we need to help them, because every time lunch is the foil of field day,

Speaker 4 21:20

it's true. Oh, speaking

Speaker 2 21:32

of when

Brandon 21:35

I have no real transition. Never mind. I thought I could come up with one, but I got one. Collin, I want to know why you are now wearing overalls and are potentially donning, like a John Deere hat. Okay, I mean,

Collin Funkhouser 21:51

Farmer Collin,

Brandon 21:53

Farmer Collin, ladies and gentlemen, we have officially arrived

Speaker 1 21:57

Brandon 21:58

farmer Collin, okay. We have not,

Speaker 2 22:01

yeah, like,

Brandon 22:01

like, there was some gardening, Okay, that's fair. That's relatively quaint, all right. Collin is going full bore, homesteader.

Collin Funkhouser 22:11

Oh, yeah, on my urban, urban, post

Speaker 1 22:15

urban

Brandon 22:15

homesteading, right? This is a thing. Is

Speaker 1 22:18

the thing

Brandon 22:18

that happens,

Speaker 1 22:19

I'm gonna

Collin Funkhouser 22:19

homestead, maxing my 1/16 of an hour

Brandon 22:23

homestead maxing. I cannot believe that said, Just give me. That hurts me all my days. Yeah? Like he's gonna put the trellis gardens, like, on the fence and on the side of the house, yeah, right.

Collin Funkhouser 22:34

Have raised beds that upper and lower portions and recirculating water systems. Oh,

Brandon 22:39

they're like,

Speaker 1 22:40

oh,

Collin Funkhouser 22:41

yeah, that's what I'm doing. No, no, although lil took an alternative gardening class this year. So

Speaker 1 22:53

are you sure alternative you're not

Brandon 22:57

like growing things in closets? Are you?

Brandon 22:59

I'm

Collin Funkhouser 23:00

Oh, we want

Speaker 1 23:06

red

Brandon 23:07

lights everywhere.

Collin Funkhouser 23:08

A lot of cameras around my house. Like one of them was aquaponics, but in, in the sense of, in the sense of we, she grew. We got some aquatic plants, and we put them in a pot, and then we fill it with water, and we let it cycle for a couple weeks. And then at the end of the semester, she got to take home a little Guppy, and we put a guppy in there. So nice. The Guppy and the aquatic plants are having a good time cycling nitrogen, and we talked about

Brandon 23:42

that. Yay, nitrogen cycling.

Collin Funkhouser 23:44

Signed up for a class this year on our little Co Op thingy, and the class's name was coop troop.

Brandon 23:56

Oh, dear. I think I see where this is going. I think I have figured out how we've arrived at farmer Collin,

Collin Funkhouser 24:02

where we they spent the entire semester learning about chickens. And turns out, at the end of the of the semester, the capstone to this one might say, You got to take home chicken from the teacher that they hatched. Now,

Brandon 24:27

I really feel like that is a that's quite an aggressive Capstone, right? Was there like a paper to sign before the chicken came home? Or were they just like, surprise sucker, here's your pink.

Collin Funkhouser 24:38

I mean, there was discussion

Speaker 2 24:39

bullet like,

Collin Funkhouser 24:41

and, and, okay, so, but here's the thing, like, he was really excited for this chicken, like, really excited for this chicken. So there was no way that I was gonna say, No, we're not getting a chicken. You. Yeah, we can't. You can't. In

Brandon 25:01

fact, one will not be sufficient.

Collin Funkhouser 25:04

Brandon, but here is the problem, you can't. You cannot have an chicken. You can't.

Brandon 25:11

I mean, could?

Collin Funkhouser 25:12

No, they get lonely, they don't die. So then, I

Brandon 25:16

mean, they are a flock. That's fair, that's fair,

Collin Funkhouser 25:19

that's fair. And so I'm like, what's the minimum number of chickens that you need to have? And depending on the breed, it's whatever, whatever. Sometimes two is fine. Sometimes they're like, You need at least five for them to thrive. And I'm like, Oh, well, hopefully I

Brandon 25:35

didn't get that fine. Did you get that one? Did you get the

Collin Funkhouser 25:37

didn't

Brandon 25:38

gotta have

Speaker 2 25:38

12 minimum birds,

Collin Funkhouser 25:40

37 and because here's also the thing Brandon, we you have to buy and construct like, a coop.

Brandon 25:50

Yes, you need a place for the chicken to be inside.

Collin Funkhouser 25:54

Yes,

Speaker 1 25:54

you have to

Brandon 25:55

like, it can't just like, I mean, it can for part of the time, just like roam about. But it does need a roost. It is a roasting bird

Collin Funkhouser 26:04

we get, we get raccoons all up in here. So, like, that

Speaker 1 26:08

Collin Funkhouser 26:08

true. I know this

Brandon 26:10

story. Yeah, we lived it. I was there,

Collin Funkhouser 26:12

so I have to, I have to buy a little chicken coop. But here's the thing, if I'm buying a chicken coop for a chicken that is madness. Might

Brandon 26:24

as well have multiple

Collin Funkhouser 26:27

chickens. Then your cost, your coop, cost per chicken goes down. The more that

Speaker 1 26:32

is true to the coop. Your

Brandon 26:33

unit rate of square foot of coop diminishes

Collin Funkhouser 26:39

the coop over chickens, right? This plan? And so we panicked, because suddenly it was like, man, we have so much time to get and chicken coop. We've there's so much time. And then the teacher,

Speaker 1 26:56

and

Brandon 26:56

it was like, It's in two days. Well, no, it

Collin Funkhouser 26:59

was like, it's in a week. Like, ah,

Brandon 27:02

yeah, it's tomorrow.

Speaker 2 27:03

No,

Brandon 27:05

run to

Brandon 27:05

race, brothers, hashtag not sponsored, right?

Collin Funkhouser 27:07

We'll say that knowing now what I know we had more time because I didn't know the age of chicks that we would be getting.

Brandon 27:22

Oh, that is crucial information.

Collin Funkhouser 27:24

It was like, five day old chicks.

Brandon 27:28

Yeah, yeah. It turns out you just need a cardboard box

Collin Funkhouser 27:31

and a heat lamp, yeah. And, but, well, let's so here. So a couple things here, a we didn't have a cardboard box like to put the chickens in that was kind of like big enough. But let me tell you the box the coop came in that case,

Brandon 27:49

who for one, yes,

Brandon 27:52

that

Collin Funkhouser 27:53

Brandon 27:54

clutch. I think they planned it that way.

Collin Funkhouser 27:56

I think they did. Also,

Brandon 27:58

that's good Designing.

Collin Funkhouser 27:59

You should

Speaker 1 27:59

put that

Brandon 28:00

on. They should put that on the marketing,

Collin Funkhouser 28:01

yeah. Also, hey,

Brandon 28:02

use the box.

Collin Funkhouser 28:03

But use

Brandon 28:04

for the chicks. Until

Speaker 1 28:05

I did, I

Collin Funkhouser 28:05

just use the box because it was real. It was just one where the box goes on top of the box. You just pull off the top, and then

Brandon 28:11

there's, oh,

Brandon 28:12

even better,

Collin Funkhouser 28:13

yeah. So

Brandon 28:14

big seem at the bottom,

Collin Funkhouser 28:15

yeah. So it's just, it's all like, nice, and it was big, but yeah, so they went, got the chickens. We got something called Green Eggers. I don't know they seem nice. Came in. We did get the coop built. It's on the side of our house, kind of a little side yard area. It's there. It's ready for them. And then when I saw the chicks. I was like, ah, they cannot go out.

Speaker 1 28:45

They

Brandon 28:45

don't need this yet.

Collin Funkhouser 28:46

Don't need this little bit premature. But hey, look, it's there. It's gonna season, right? It's gonna, yeah, they'll love it. But we, I do have to say, when we went to, we went to tractor. So in my town, I have a Sutherlands, which is a like home goods, Farm Supply. I've heard of this. We have a Lowe's, I have a Menards, I have a Farm and Home supply. I have a Tractor Supply, and then I have, like, a more local kind of derivative of all

Brandon 29:18

the dang dang

Brandon 29:20

we spoil

Brandon 29:21

for choice.

Collin Funkhouser 29:22

We are spoiled for choice. However, we had two criteria. It had to be a, cheap and B, small. Well,

Brandon 29:28

I mean, yes, if you only

Collin Funkhouser 29:30

discussion on no property to put this on,

Speaker 1 29:33

yeah,

Collin Funkhouser 29:33

which gave

Brandon 29:34

you ended up with two chickens. Is this correct?

Collin Funkhouser 29:37

Two? Because Okay, so Okay, doesn't

Brandon 29:39

need to be large.

Collin Funkhouser 29:40

My daughter showed up, and they were like, well, obviously you should you get a chicken? So here

Brandon 29:46

she was like, Yeah, okay, it's

Collin Funkhouser 29:48

funny. Okay. Anyway,

Collin Funkhouser 29:53

I bought the smallest one. It says it can do up to six chickens. But everyone was like, do not. I'll put six chickens in this. This is like a four chicken thing max. And I was like, cool, because I have two, so we're on the right track.

Brandon 30:06

This is, like, serving sizes. When they're like, oh, this serves four. And then you put it, you cook it, you're like, No, it doesn't Yes,

Collin Funkhouser 30:13

because I actually saw a picture of somebody who on the review on Amazon had put six chickens in there. And I was like, Oh, they look so sad, like scrunched like, what people basically do then is they just leave the door open and they build out just their own run. Because this is supposed to be like a coop and run combo, where the coop sits on top and the run comes out, and then underneath the coop a little bit. So they have it supposed to maximize their capacity anyway. And this

Brandon 30:42

is just for, like, the roosting bit, like, just a, yeah,

Collin Funkhouser 30:45

well, and then the run is underneath it too and across from it, so it, they do have enough square footage, yeah,

Brandon 30:52

they can

Brandon 30:52

get out of the little

Collin Funkhouser 30:53

spot. Yeah, kind of run around. There's a little door that comes down you slide open. And anyway, I bought the smallest one, and then I was like, Cool, let's bring this home. And he's late. And I said, we'll just, you know, pull it out front. He goes, Oh no, you have to go around back and they'll get the forklift ready for you. And excuse

Speaker 1 31:12

me,

Collin Funkhouser 31:13

I'm sorry, what? And he goes, Yeah, they'll get the forklift up for you. Don't worry about it. They'll get it loaded for you. Brandon, I

Speaker 1 31:22

have

Brandon 31:23

a truck. You're not truck boy, right?

Collin Funkhouser 31:25

You

Brandon 31:26

haven't, you haven't, like, become full Dad,

Speaker 1 31:28

no,

Brandon 31:29

you're not rocking the truck. You got the chicken coop. Okay? And

Collin Funkhouser 31:33

coop, I have feed, feed bin, water bin. I bought the, I bought the, actually, the chick starter kit, because I actually priced

Speaker 4 31:42

it nice.

Collin Funkhouser 31:42

I was like, Ah, well, this is an issue. So I pulled around back in my kind of small SUV, not the Jeep, but the GX and and they come around, and sure enough, it's, it's, it's the it's, it's broken down, it's deconstructed, but it's, it's a little bit wider than a full palette.

Speaker 1 32:04

Oh, really,

Collin Funkhouser 32:05

yeah, it's like, oh, it's big. Like, it's why it's all flat, okay, construct it, yeah, it's all in this massive box that's basically, like, four by four, and actually a little bit bigger than that. And, yeah, I'm like, Oh, well. And he's like, back her up. Like,

Brandon 32:26

well, there's no confidence in the world like that of a forklift driver. They're like, like, any, really, any machinery operator, right? Like, you may think, like professional athletes are confident in their abilities. No, no, no, no. The real MVPs of the confidence world are heavy machinery operations.

Collin Funkhouser 32:51

And you know what? 99% of the time, absolutely like they

Brandon 32:56

are.

Brandon 32:56

Yes, it is, I'm not saying it's not warranted.

Collin Funkhouser 32:58

Oh yeah, no,

Brandon 32:59

it's because almost not again, not in 100% of cases, because I have seen some very catastrophic forklift accidents 99%

Collin Funkhouser 33:07

of the time.

Brandon 33:08

However, the majority of people that I have seen operating scenes like it's fine.

Collin Funkhouser 33:14

So this guy,

Brandon 33:16

you don't need to worry.

Collin Funkhouser 33:18

I back up my door. I don't have a normal hatch because I didn't it barn door. It swings open to the side. It's this massive door. Oh yeah, up, right. So I have to stop. I have to open up. And he just comes, like, charging in. And I'm doing the like, the eye calculation of like, from there into my thing, there into my thing. I'm like, this is either not going to fit or I'm going to be like, this is going to like, be pushing

Brandon 33:46

out millimeter.

Speaker 2 33:47

Yes.

Collin Funkhouser 33:47

So he gets it up. We rest on the back bumper. I pull out. I thankfully had a tarp to come up and put down so that I could put this, pick this up and push and slide it in. Yeah. The kids put their seats all the way forward, like cram their seats as far forward as they could go. Thankfully, they adjust. And this thing, this, I will tell you, the GX was made

Speaker 1 34:14

for to

Collin Funkhouser 34:16

transport this coop troop. It was that when the when the designers at Lexus sat down to determine what they would be building, they said, we are going to build this to spec, to fit a D, a deconstructed Sentinel coupe in 2026 it was front to back, side to side. Fit perfectly there with the door shut, it was like, boom, done.

Brandon 34:49

That's crazy.

Collin Funkhouser 34:51

We get home, unload it. It weighs 190 pounds, right? Yeah. It's a beast. We build it in lender an hour. Get out there, get the chicks in the because then I was like, Oh, wait, we can't put them in here. We put them in the box. Problem with the box, the box, while four by four is only like, maybe 10 inches high,

Brandon 35:16

tall,

Collin Funkhouser 35:17

is it? Here's something about chicks that I remember they

Brandon 35:20

can hop.

Collin Funkhouser 35:22

Now I'm dealing with five day old chicks, so this isn't that big a deal, but

Speaker 1 35:26

Brandon 35:27

just soon,

Collin Funkhouser 35:28

soon and and the problem is, is that they're in a garage, and soon, and when they're get out, death comes quickly.

Speaker 1 35:37

Yeah,

Collin Funkhouser 35:37

without heat. So I'm already like, our days, our days are numbered within in this setup. Like, we've got to start thinking. But I'm like, well,

Brandon 35:46

especially with, like, last night, last night was really cold.

Collin Funkhouser 35:48

It was like 30 degrees, I know, so

Brandon 35:53

perfect may temperature.

Collin Funkhouser 35:56

That's the date, that's the night that the chicks gonna be like we and then, so we start frantically trying to figure out and then and then my my genius struck again, because on Monday, not only did I get chickens, but I got a brand new stove delivered.

Speaker 1 36:24

Oh,

Collin Funkhouser 36:25

and an above the stove microwave was delivered. Oh, there we go. And I'm staring at that microwave box, and I'm like, ya know,

Speaker 1 36:36

I actually

Collin Funkhouser 36:37

looking

Brandon 36:38

pretty. It

Collin Funkhouser 36:39

looks like I'm pretty chickeny to me.

Speaker 2 36:41

It does look

Brandon 36:42

really much taller,

Collin Funkhouser 36:45

definitely taller. So I ditched the other one. It was good. It served its purpose for a couple days, and then I put them in this and then immediately had to bring our chickens inside because it was very cold, and I couldn't keep it warm enough outside. So now they're,

Speaker 1 37:04

yeah,

Collin Funkhouser 37:04

in my they're in my kitchen, and I have a piece of of wood, a two by four going across from my island to my counter, with the heat lamp clipped onto that with a safety pin through a car beater so it can't fall off. And then I also have taped a wireless camera to a stick and stuck it straight down so we can monitor the chicks while we're out and about, perfect. And everyone in the house is very happy when the chicks were out in the garage, the kids came downstairs and then went immediately outside and did not come back into my house for another hour and a half,

Brandon 37:49

just staring at chicks like,

Collin Funkhouser 37:51

well, here's what they have done. They have taken our yoga mats and have set them up out in the garage where they will lay down, and then put the chick on their chest, and then they will pet them while they're locked down on the yoga

Brandon 38:06

mat. Well, okay, that is a thing you can do. Yeah,

Collin Funkhouser 38:13

Megan and I had a really important phone call on Tuesday, and we were there for like an hour and a half this fine. We told the kids, hey, we can do this. You know, set the ground rules from when we kind of have to lock ourselves away, only come in when somebody's bleeding or on fire and you know, then, like, only when it's real bad. And we came downstairs, obviously there was no one in the house, on to taped to the counter, note in Lillian's handwriting, and it all it said was out to chicken.

Brandon 38:47

Ah, yes,

Collin Funkhouser 38:48

out

Brandon 38:50

to chicken.

Speaker 2 38:51

Perfect.

Brandon 38:55

I like

Brandon 38:57

it.

Collin Funkhouser 38:57

So we have started our chicken saga with the

Brandon 39:04

arc continues. Who would have guessed that all these years later, chicken farmer Collin would make a reappearance? Right?

Collin Funkhouser 39:14

Return?

Brandon 39:15

Yeah, triumphant return of Collin the chicken farmer, right? This is this incredible. I'm gonna say I did not really have this pegged, that we would come back here, we would circle back,

Collin Funkhouser 39:28

yes,

Brandon 39:29

like 30 years later, to chickening. But

Collin Funkhouser 39:33

we have chickens once again. The great chicken has happened,

Brandon 39:38

the RE

Speaker 1 39:38

chickening

Collin Funkhouser 39:39

every every 30 years, it happens. And so, yeah, so now we are in this where I'm trying to because also the chickens are in my house. Okay, this is fine. It's cold outside on Monday, which is check Notes. Uh, four days away, my kitchen is getting completely demolished so I can get

Brandon 40:06

new That's right.

Collin Funkhouser 40:09

Oh, and I don't know how long this is going to take, because they don't know how long it's going to take. That's

Brandon 40:16

a good thing.

Collin Funkhouser 40:18

My house is 110 years old and whatever. So like, who knows what they're gonna find when they start tearing

Brandon 40:24

up the floor. It's like, Oh yeah, it's not

Collin Funkhouser 40:26

gonna be good, because also then on the 18th, my upstairs gets completely destroyed and obliterated because I'm getting new carpets.

Brandon 40:36

Oh my gosh.

Collin Funkhouser 40:37

So, I mean,

Brandon 40:41

luckily, the box pen is mobile for a while. I feel I'm probably Collin it now that chicken box is gonna end up in your daughter's room for at least a day. Okay, that's gonna be in there.

Collin Funkhouser 40:55

She did ask me. She said, Dad, do we have two other boxes. Said, no, why? Well, because then Noah and I could put our chickens, each in our own box, and then like take them to our rooms for a while. Said, No, you were not taking your chicken to your room.

Brandon 41:17

Chickens, they need to be to get their flock, animal, flock animal, talked about flocking.

Collin Funkhouser 41:25

Oh, and of course, our dog is just like, not okay.

Brandon 41:30

I'm excited to see her hurting the chickens about right?

Collin Funkhouser 41:33

It's so we brought him inside, and as soon as I texted you this, but it's so funny, they'll hurt her face. She's

Brandon 41:42

making that picture. So she's

Collin Funkhouser 41:45

just like, like, ah. Now, thankfully she can't see over this, because she herself is an tiny dog, yeah,

Speaker 1 41:54

very small.

Collin Funkhouser 41:55

This is much, much beneficial. But yes, she's concerned when she gets tired enough, or remembers that she has children to herd. She'll leave the chickens. But then when they get excited or start chirping, she immediately sprints over and doesn't lap around the box. And yes, every time she does it, I just yell, my babies

Speaker 2 42:16

must investigate this noise. What is in the box?

Collin Funkhouser 42:20

She's like, very earnest. Just getting over there. It's very concerts. My babies

Brandon 42:26

so hilarious.

Collin Funkhouser 42:38

So our chickens are chickening. My children are happy. Yes, they are very happy. The other thing I've done this week is tomorrow the Honda goes off to its next and better life, where it is being donated for charity. Most

Speaker 1 43:06

Oh,

Collin Funkhouser 43:07

yes, okay, yes, yes, because you can't hard sell a vehicle whenever you've removed the driver and passed your seats.

Brandon 43:16

No, it's fine for

Collin Funkhouser 43:17

I'm sure someone

Brandon 43:18

will buy it. I'm

Speaker 1 43:18

sure

Collin Funkhouser 43:18

someone would or will, but I didn't want to have to go through that process of explaining to each individual buyer why it is sand seats.

Brandon 43:26

So we just lie and be like, Oh, they were damaged.

Collin Funkhouser 43:30

I just kept telling people when they're going through the process, I called a couple different charities to do this kind of thing, and they're like, does it run? And I was like, yes, does it have to have the seats? There was a long pause, and they were like, does it not have seats? And all I said was, it's for a project. There you see this project, and yes, just as you know, they will accept cars without seats.

Speaker 3 43:59

Speaker 1 43:59

course, like

Collin Funkhouser 44:00

you can

Brandon 44:00

get more seat, you can buy aftermarket seats. It's a thing you can buy,

Collin Funkhouser 44:03

you know. So, you know, I should have known that they would be okay with accepting. But this, this has brought up a much consternation that I have spent today, consternating about because, what is it, Brandon, when you when you go to sell a vehicle, on the back of your title for your car, you're supposed to fill out all of these very important boxes. And if you miss a box, or you do one wrong, I don't know, people show up at your house and you never see it again. You're disappeared to the Mojave Desert or something

Brandon 44:40

essentially

Collin Funkhouser 44:40

x, right? So, like, you're supposed to fill in the seller's information and, and that's all, like, typically, it's all you do. And then the

Speaker 1 44:47

Yeah,

Collin Funkhouser 44:48

but

Brandon 44:49

who's buying it, right? You get to play, like, the how much it was, yeah,

Speaker 1 44:52

and

Collin Funkhouser 44:52

then, because, then

Speaker 1 44:53

they have to take it and pay tax, the Department of

Collin Funkhouser 44:56

Revenue also wants to have the notice. Of sale or transfer. And why is this important? Well, I was notified by the Department of Revenue today that, look, it's not like really important that you notify us that you've sold this. However, if the person you sell it to does nefarious things or maybe they don't file the paperwork appropriately to claim that they have it, you will be on the hook for property taxes and oh yeah, runs over somebody Yeah,

Brandon 45:29

because it doesn't like because it it still registers as yours,

Speaker 1 45:33

or if it

Brandon 45:34

is involved in some sort of nefarious event, like the police will come to you because this vehicle registered to you. No, no, not at all,

Collin Funkhouser 45:43

yes. So actually

Speaker 1 45:46

the real

Brandon 45:46

reason is so they can tax you on it, and not billionaires anyway.

Collin Funkhouser 45:50

Great stuff, great, great conversation on taxes, moving on. So yes, I have to fill out a notice of sale or transfer. I also learned today that you have to fill out form 768, which is just called the quote general affidavit. This is the, this is the form that has 12345677, statements on it that are not related to any one of the others in any way, shape or form. This is the statement. This is the form, the general affidavit, form, 768, that is the we don't want to make another form, so we put the seven leftover things on this. And yes, Brandon, in case you're watching seventh, the seventh one you could check is other

Brandon 46:34

nice, yes. Need a good other on a form right, with just lines. This says, like, explain,

Collin Funkhouser 46:44

so I have to fill out form 5049, which is the notice of sale or transfer. And then they also said that I had to fill out a form 768, the general affidavit. The first one is, you check all the one that applies. Because she said not more than one of these will apply. And I went, that is really interesting. So it says the motor like you Collin

Brandon 47:03

took that as a challenge. The first one

Collin Funkhouser 47:07

said, the motor vehicle described on the attached application has not been operated on public roads and or the highways of Missouri by myself or my agent during the period of x to x, x, and I have to have it notarized for some reason. Then the next one is, I'm giving the unit described below to charity. And then it goes on to describe you. It's like, all these different, like, weird things. And then, yes, the very last one is other. And I'm like, what on what? Why would you? Whatever. So here's the problem, though, on on the notice of sale or transfer, it asks for the purchaser's name, their address, their city, state, asks for their date of birth, and then it also says that their signature is required. Now I am donating this to a charity, and Frank, that's his name, will be here tomorrow at 8am to take my car. Frank is a tow truck driver. That's all he does. He's donated. That's he's just connected to this network. He picks up cars for this charity. I'm sure he's reimbursed a portion of this back to him. I'm not selling, not selling my car to Frank. So it literally says purchaser signature required. So I call the department of motor vehicle. I say, hey, Department of Motor Vehicle and Department of Revenue, what do I do? Because I'm doing this thing. And then she was like, Oh, well, you have to form. This was also led to some confusion, because she was like, Well, you have to fill out. You have to fill out the notice of sale of transfer and form 768, and I went, they didn't tell me I needed to do either of those things. They just said to sign the title. And she went, Yeah, they're going to do that. I was like, Oh, great. I said, sadly, Kathy, what what do I do about this purchaser signature required? She goes, Yeah, you'll have to have them sign that. And I went, Yeah, so I explained it to her again, and she went, Yeah, you'll have to sign that. And I went, Okay, so I called. She said, you'll need to call who you're donating this to and talk to them about it. So I called the place I'm going to talk to. Let me

Brandon 49:20

actually they know what to do, because they've done this before. Yes, you would imagine.

Collin Funkhouser 49:24

So I believe I said, hey, hey, car donation place. Just to clarify, my car is getting picked up tomorrow at 8am by Frank, who's very nice, who called me and talked to me about the whole process from his end, and Frank said he can't sign it because he's not buying the car. He just needs the signed title, and the car, it doesn't need anything else for this. I was like, okay, cool. So anyway, I just, I just noticed this one little thing here. It says purchaser signature is required. It's in parentheses, but it's right next to that, Neil, what do I do? And Neil said, Oh. You don't, it doesn't need to be signed. And I went,

Speaker 1 50:04

so I

Collin Funkhouser 50:06

understand that, Neil, just also, are there any other forms that I need to fill out for to do this? I've never donated a car before or done this before. Anything else? No, you just need to sign the title in the seller spot, and that's it. And I went, well, that's weird, because the lady at the department revenue had two other forms. Do you know anything about form 768, and form 5049, long pause. And I went, I'm going to take that as a no Neil, so again on the signature, who is signing this? And he went, You do not need this to be signed, because this is a charity, you're going to put down this XYZ specific information when we get the vehicle. Then you are going to get a receipt. Once the receipt is with you, then you will file the transfer with the state, and that, because we're a charity, they'll they'll accept it,

Brandon 51:02

allegedly, but Neil required, this is this reminded me of this, like comedian thing that I watched, right? And he was talking about, like, I saw it somewhere, and he was, like, talking about the difference between like him and like his German friend, right? And he was like, like, man, wouldn't it be like, the American guy was like, Oh, yeah. Wouldn't it be funny if you could do this? And the German guy was just like, No, you cannot do this. It is not possible. Like, no. He was like, Yeah, but what if you did and he's like, No, cannot do this. It's not allowed you right now.

Collin Funkhouser 51:45

This is what I feel. I definitely feel this. And so, you know what I says to myself, self, I don't know what to do with this situation because it says required. The lady was like, well, and maybe, maybe the Department of Revenue lady didn't understand what I was doing. Maybe she thought I was just transferring this to somebody, and she didn't pick up that it was donating to charity. Maybe, like,

Brandon 52:12

that's potential.

Collin Funkhouser 52:14

Well, yeah, once they, she goes, once the seller sells, once they, once the buyer gets it, they'll need to buy it. They'll need to blah, blah, blah.

Brandon 52:22

I went buying it. I'm buying it to

Collin Funkhouser 52:26

them. Very weird. So it may very well be, very well be that there is a loophole in that when it says required, it doesn't, it always means required, except for you're doing like a remote donation charity thing, yeah, in which case I guess we'll find out. So I have my paperwork ready. I can't file this yet because I don't have the receipt proving that they've done something with it.

Speaker 1 52:51

Yeah,

Collin Funkhouser 52:52

so then that just means that my car is, in fact, sitting out there in limbo,

Speaker 1 52:57

true,

Collin Funkhouser 52:57

and I

Brandon 52:58

existing and non existing simultaneously. Schrodingers card.

Collin Funkhouser 53:04

Oh, look at that tie in. Look at

Speaker 2 53:06

that tie in. And

Collin Funkhouser 53:09

I hope, because, again, also, also, here's this other thing. I'm like, Well, this has required. On the back, it also said that I must file this within 30 days. Is that what part of this is true anymore. I'm questioning everything. Okay,

Brandon 53:22

yeah, that's true.

Speaker 2 53:24

How much of this is real? I don't know

Collin Funkhouser 53:28

is real because I don't know. No

Brandon 53:36

one knows.

Collin Funkhouser 53:36

Neil was fine, whatever. So we are, we are, we will see. We will see what happens here. I have all my paperwork set aside nine o'clock. Here's my tomorrow. Nine o'clock, car is supposed to get picked up. Boom, boom, boom. Then, unfortunately, I do have to go drop off my other car at the body shop, because I was driving the car, my car, and I was in the left lane, and I said to myself, self, I need to get into the right lane because I have to turn right. I put on my blinker, start to go into the right lane. At that moment, a chunk of firewood fell off of the truck in front of me. No, I tried to swerve. And here's the here Brent, here's the annoying part. Had I just stayed the course, I would have plowed over this little piece of firewood, and I would have hit it probably dead center. It would have been a weird bump, right? I

Speaker 1 54:34

don't

Brandon 54:34

know. It could have, like, you never know when you go over something there always ends up ripping out some sort of, like, terribly exciting thing underneath the car, right? Because, yeah, it'll, like, especially big piece of wood, right? If it angled up,

Collin Funkhouser 54:48

yes,

Brandon 54:49

the wrong moment, it would destroy whatever is under there,

Collin Funkhouser 54:54

because I was going, like, at speed, so it probably would have been, yeah. And so what happened was, is. I swerved back into the left just enough so that my right back tire clipped the very edge of the piece of wood, which flipped it up and jammed it into my back right corner panel, and like the wood, oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, it's great. Looks fantastic. Yeah. And I went and, you know, they were like, you want to file an insurance claim on this? I'm like, There's no way. I can't. Like, I just it's,

Brandon 55:40

they will laugh at me. Don't

Collin Funkhouser 55:43

have to file a claim on this. Would,

Brandon 55:46

I mean, because it did fall off of somebody else's car, I guess, like,

Collin Funkhouser 55:51

it did and, and, yes, like, the repair

Brandon 55:55

final destination was, like, happening here

Collin Funkhouser 55:57

to repair, this was 1000s of dollars. And I'm like,

Brandon 56:01

oh, yeah, of course.

Collin Funkhouser 56:01

Oh, okay, cool, cool, cool, cool. So I have to drop that off and then go pick up a well, we're gonna pick up the rental. Because I'm like, I have to have two vehicles. I can't have one, like, ah, yeah, because then they're like, well, we this. We may get the sun in a week. We may not. We don't know, have fun. You know, mystery parts, some just want to come home and sit with my chickens.

Brandon 56:33

Lay on the yoga mat, Collin,

Brandon 56:37

stress relief, chicken yoga

Collin Funkhouser 56:40

is your next big thing? And she's like, what Dad and I said, chicken yoga. And of course, she went, she went, Yeah, you could bring your chicken to yoga. And I was like, No, you have the chickens. People come to yoga around the chicken, yeah, and

Brandon 56:55

they pay you

Speaker 2 56:56

for chicken yoga. I don't

Brandon 56:58

know how relaxing chicken yoga would be because, well, no, yeah, they're like, weirdly aggressive sometimes, and they just like, poop everywhere, right? So like trying to be all like Zen and calm, and then, like, getting pooped on the shoulder by, like, a big chicken, that is not really particularly relaxing,

Collin Funkhouser 57:19

yes,

Speaker 2 57:20

right? Like,

Collin Funkhouser 57:21

my children have learned this the hard way of like,

Brandon 57:27

bird poop is gross. Yeah, they're not clean animals at all. No, they are gross. Like, you're disgusting and they're weird. And like, I don't, yeah, I don't know.

Collin Funkhouser 57:43

So this has been, this has been my week. It's been, Oh, I did. I didn't even tell you. We did, like, a ribbon cutting for the business. What's your business? No,

Brandon 58:00

you already have ribbons. You've already cut ribbons. Yes, we've never done a ribbon. You've never cut or Collin, you can't have a ribbon cutting after you've been open for, like, 12 years.

Collin Funkhouser 58:09

That's not how ribbons work. No, don't tell them that. Don't tell them. Here's, here's what happens when you join a Chamber of Commerce. One of the things they want to do is do a ribbon cutting. It's a welcome to the chamber.

Speaker 1 58:21

Oh, yeah.

Collin Funkhouser 58:22

So we, we did that. We did that. We Where

Brandon 58:26

did you do it? Ah, yes, good question. Go outside between two fire hydrants to like, yeah, no, we

Collin Funkhouser 58:33

don't know.

Speaker 2 58:35

Got it?

Collin Funkhouser 58:35

We did it at this chambers, like Office, headquarters. Oh, okay,

Brandon 58:39

okay. It's like a ceremonial just between the sconces at the office. They just set up bollards. They just set up the where, instead of like, the thing where they you put the like, roll out the like, the tape. You know, whenever that you have a line, like at the airport, oh yes. And you, like, pull out the little thing, and it connects so you can sneak around. It's like that they just put that thing down, stick a ribbon in

Speaker 1 59:08

there. Did

Brandon 59:09

you how did you handle the comically large scissors?

Collin Funkhouser 59:13

So I, I delegated this task to Megan.

Speaker 2 59:18

She loved that. She

Speaker 1 59:20

loved

Collin Funkhouser 59:21

being front and center. Oh

Brandon 59:23

yes, that's her favorite thing, is being in the limelight,

Collin Funkhouser 59:25

limelight. She did. She's professional job. She's pro at this. But here's, here's. So we were like, I've been, I've been to a couple of these things, and they always have, like, food and such, and coutre Montes. And I was like, well, so how many do we need to plan for being there? So I asked, and the Chamber president was like, plan for having about 30 people there. There's plus or minus whoever you're gonna have there, but that'll include some of the chamber ambassadors. So you could sign up to volunteer, and your job is to, like, show up to everything and be like cheerleaders for the chamber stuff. So there's, you know.

Speaker 1 1:00:00

Those people

Brandon 1:00:00

just to be in the crowd. Like

Brandon 1:00:02

Speaker 1 1:00:02

pad

Brandon 1:00:02

the crowd a little

Collin Funkhouser 1:00:03

bit, adding the crowd. They are paid, paid to teach it to your loudly paid actors. No, so I could

Brandon 1:00:10

do that. I could show up in my bow tie and, like, Clap loudly. Yo, hey,

Collin Funkhouser 1:00:15

what people do? So

Brandon 1:00:17

they pay for this. I can do

Collin Funkhouser 1:00:18

this. No, you don't get paid. It's volunteer,

Brandon 1:00:20

dang it. You

Collin Funkhouser 1:00:20

have to have something to pitch, though, and so this is why most of the chamber masters are filled with realtors, because they want to be seen and known everywhere. That's

Brandon 1:00:30

true. All they do is pitch all the time.

Collin Funkhouser 1:00:32

All they do is pitch no so we it's gonna be over lunch, and we were gonna be hungry, so we catered with boxed subway boxes with food in there with chips, water for 30 people. And approximately 12 people showed up dang

Brandon 1:00:53

well. I mean, that keeps those so now you got lunch for like two weeks. You good?

Collin Funkhouser 1:00:58

We did. We all had, yes, we that day, we had subway for lunch, and then we had subway for dinner, and then today, I had subway for lunch and then subway for dinner.

Brandon 1:01:10

Yes, see, it's fine. You gotta use it

Collin Funkhouser 1:01:13

up. It's totally fine. But here's the thing. Here they as part of this, they do this. It's kind of nice, like you sit around. Everybody there goes around and introduces themselves, saying hi, even though I kind of know them already. And then they go to you, and then they hand you a little microphone and a little video, and then you're supposed to introduce yourself. You're introducing yourself not just to the people in the room, but they video introducing it to the community of like, who we are. Hi. Welcome to here. We're really excited.

Speaker 1 1:01:37

Yeah.

Collin Funkhouser 1:01:38

So we do our little spiel, they clap, we answer some questions, whatever, whatever. And it's great. We go. We get home. On our way, we're leaving town, and I'm like, I have to get home. I cannot be in town anymore. We're going to be late for our next thing, which is two hours north, because that's how we live. And I'm for

Brandon 1:01:55

chicken feeding

Brandon 1:01:59

your

Collin Funkhouser 1:01:59

chickens.

Brandon 1:02:01

You can now use this excuse all the time.

Speaker 1 1:02:03

I know,

Brandon 1:02:04

by the way, right? You can expedite the mid to west. Goodbye with I gotta go home and feed the chickens.

Collin Funkhouser 1:02:09

I got chickens,

Speaker 2 1:02:10

and they'll be like, Oh,

Collin Funkhouser 1:02:11

makes sense. No, we're driving away. And I could phone call and it's the chamber, and they're like, hey, loved it. It was great, fantastic. Love what you guys did. Really glad that you're here. Hey, when we shot the video, we forgot to turn on the microphone that you were using. We can't we have this beautiful video. It's great video. No sound at all. Could you come back and get this taken care of and just shoot it again? Pretend. And I went,

Brandon 1:02:49

Oh, she's done voiceover. Well, right? So David Attenborough voice. And now here we see right, the ribbon cutting ceremony commencing. Right? This ceremony is often used to commemorate the opening and membership into new businesses. Right? It's a very antiquated ritual, but it stuck around for quite a long time.

Collin Funkhouser 1:03:13

They're gathering, some commonly for food, others and

Brandon 1:03:19

some small talk. Right? This person appears to be peddling condominiums.

Collin Funkhouser 1:03:26

So me on the phone yesterday, frazzled by this thing. Yesterday was Thursday, and then I had some things to do and I could speak it by. I said, hey, we'll we'll just come by tomorrow, see you. Then bye. Hung up. Megan is sitting in the passenger seat just staring at me. And I'm like, oh, man, video didn't work. We'll get it done tomorrow, because I got to come back anyway and make it to it. Collin, it's Wednesday. You're not coming back down tomorrow. And I'm like, Ah, hmm. What am I doing instead? What did we do this morning, we set up our table. Wore the exact same clothes that we did. No, we didn't wear the exact clothes. No, we set up our table as we had it set up at the thing we stood behind it. It just so happens that I I have wireless mics that I can record to my phone with because podcasting and I set up a tripod, and we just recorded it ourselves, edited it, sent it over to her with a Google link. It was like, Here, use this

Speaker 1 1:04:28

nice

Collin Funkhouser 1:04:28

and. And she was like, Oh, well, this actually, yeah, that's awesome. Thanks. And

Brandon 1:04:34

I know

Collin Funkhouser 1:04:35

you're

Speaker 1 1:04:35

welcome.

Collin Funkhouser 1:04:36

That's what did

Brandon 1:04:37

you set up like, a little small, like ribbon, and just use normal size scissors to, like, they get in the vibe, like,

Collin Funkhouser 1:04:45

No, I should have, I should have done, like, present perspective of just like, put my really close,

Speaker 2 1:04:52

really close. They're

Collin Funkhouser 1:04:54

so great. My back. Guard, I shot a video and said, Hello, chamber.

Speaker 2 1:05:06

I'm here to cut a ribbon.

Collin Funkhouser 1:05:07

Yes,

Speaker 2 1:05:08

yeah,

Collin Funkhouser 1:05:09

so that's what that was. Geez, that's my barely surviving this week.

Brandon 1:05:16

That's insanity, and

Collin Funkhouser 1:05:18

I've only had chickens for like, for like, four days. Dang

Brandon 1:05:25

life of a farmer's tough. Collin,

Speaker 1 1:05:27

you

Speaker 2 1:05:28

got

Collin Funkhouser 1:05:29

it for the long haul.

Brandon 1:05:40

Oh my gosh, gonna have to get Lily not a little hat. Little farmer hats.

Collin Funkhouser 1:05:47

She needs a little appeal to like, Oh, definitely. A

Brandon 1:05:52

pail. Yeah, a pail is important for farming,

Speaker 1 1:05:55

yes, right,

Collin Funkhouser 1:05:57

all the things,

Brandon 1:05:58

some gloves, potentially, right? Oh, yeah,

Speaker 1 1:06:01

yes, yes, I

Brandon 1:06:03

like it.

Collin Funkhouser 1:06:04

So, yeah, I do you have any do you have anything else?

Brandon 1:06:11

I do not have anything else, because I was gonna say next week.

Collin Funkhouser 1:06:16

Yes, right,

Brandon 1:06:17

coming next week, right? The the official early, right? We're getting on the bandwagon early because apparently Stadium was very got off their horse and did something. We're gonna have the official early bird State Fair draft, right? Five, five bands. You said because I

Collin Funkhouser 1:06:39

think, because I think so, yes, I think

Brandon 1:06:41

that's what we've been doing, is something like that,

Collin Funkhouser 1:06:43

right? Because then that way they can pick some from each of ours. Like, I will say that I think since we last spoke, they've released two more, but I have avoided this. I don't know any of them.

Brandon 1:06:55

Okay,

Brandon 1:06:55

okay. I like, we're gonna go five anyway, because, I mean, we have the top five lists. Oh, I have

Collin Funkhouser 1:07:04

to have this. Yes. I

Brandon 1:07:05

mean, it has to be

Collin Funkhouser 1:07:06

five. Yes, I have my five. So yes, that will be next week. And I'm very excited.

Speaker 1 1:07:11

Okay,

Brandon 1:07:11

all right, so next week will be that, and then Collin and I are zeroing in on summer reading book.

Collin Funkhouser 1:07:17

Yes,

Speaker 1 1:07:18

right.

Brandon 1:07:20

We got two choices. We'll just decide between those two. I like those two, right?

Speaker 1 1:07:24

Good.

Brandon 1:07:24

So we'll just figure out which one of those, because I've either one, I think so like, we're trying to

Speaker 1 1:07:30

figure

Collin Funkhouser 1:07:30

out which one I can probably get easier access to. I mean, yes, that's fair. That's fair, hidden somewhere. So, yeah, hey, he's better, yeah, exciting factor.

Brandon 1:07:38

I mean, yes, so let's let me know, because I also, I do not have either of those books, so I need to find that. But then we can start thinking about that, and we can do like, whatever we decide and whenever we can actually get them. Then we will do our official unveiling and like background, our traditional background episode, right? Yes, where with the introduction stuff, so we can plan from there. So that is the the plan moving forward, right? So stay tuned for all that excitement, right? So take it away. Collin,

Collin Funkhouser 1:08:13

aha. So here we go. Engine, quiet now. Chairs, carry our stories on. Grateful for the miles.

Brandon 1:08:24

Oh, it's so good.

Collin Funkhouser 1:08:28

Yes, so yes, yes. Now I just have to make the cheers, but they're there. That's okay.

Brandon 1:08:40

Ready for the next chapter. I like this

Speaker 1 1:08:43

Brandon 1:08:44

excellent, beautiful, fitting tribute.

Collin Funkhouser 1:08:48

Yes,

Speaker 1 1:08:50

yes,

Collin Funkhouser 1:08:51

hey, well, we will continue on, carry on and come back ready for fans and then summer reading. I'm excited for this. Yeah,

Speaker 1 1:08:58

there we go.

Collin Funkhouser 1:09:01

Okay, well, we'll do this again next

Brandon 1:09:04

time we will. I mean,

Collin Funkhouser 1:09:05

love you,

Brandon 1:09:06

love you,

Speaker 1 1:09:07

bye,

Brandon 1:09:07

bye. You.